Monsters Underneath
by TheWritingMonster
Summary: Inside the walls of the Palm Woods Mental Institution are the afflicted, broken and dangerous. They've been committed in hopes to cure their disorders, but some can't be cured. These are their stories. Rated for slight adult themes. -DISCONTINUED-
1. Chapter 1

This story had been in the works for quite some time, I just never had the motivation to actually write it. After reading We're All Mad Here by **SlntLullaby** I finally had the inspiration to write this story. This story centers around Carlos and his relationship with my OC Alana who has been revamped for this story. You'll get to learn about the boys' disorders and Alana's as this story unfolds. So I hope you all enjoy and I'll try to update as quickly as possible.

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><p><em>Inside the doors of the Palm Woods Mental Institution are the afflicted, broken and dangerous (to themselves as well as others). Some residents are able to leave and go back to living normal ordinary lives, but there are those that can never leave because their sickness is eating them alive and refuse to believe it or their illness has become a part of them.<em>

_These are their stories._

_**{***}**_

Carlos took out his colored pencils and began to draw in the new sketchbook that his brother had given him a few weeks ago. He began to draw the Jennifer's (_as usual_) the 3 of them set on fire; a smile drew itself onto his face as he drew the skinny girls being consumed by fire (_his only true love, those beautiful orange and red flames_).

"Hey Carlos," his roommate James greeted him with a small smile.

"Hey James," he replied looking up briefly then went back to his drawing.

"I heard the guards talking and they said that someone new is coming here," the tall brunette replied as he sat down on his own bed as he pulled a magazine from under his pillow.

"Oh… that's cool, wanna see what I drew?" he asked holding out his sketchbook for the other to take.

"Sure… wow it looks just like them, but why are they always on fire?" James asked handing back the sketchpad to Carlos; he never could understand the shorter boy's obsession with fire.

"Because fire is beautiful, fire makes everything more beautiful," he replied with a shrug as if it all made sense.

"Oh… okay," the other simply stated not sure if he should mention the flaw in the shorter boy's logic.

Besides he knew that Carlos would only remind him of how own flawed logic (_but the only flaw about James was that he was __**fat-fat-fat**_). And he knew that if he tried to tell the Latino about how gross or disgusting he felt after eating or talking to his therapist (_she said he was sick, she said he was going to die…but he knows __**she's a liar**_), the pyromaniac would only stare at him with a blank look in his eyes then announce to him the amount of gasoline it would take to burn a car, bus or a house down.

_(Carlos even mentioned how long it would take to fully burn a human body and he'd be lying if he said that didn't scare him at all.)_

"Hey what time is it?" Carlos asked suddenly, his voice pulling the brunette out of his thoughts.

"It's 3:30, "therapy" time right?" the other said with a roll of his eyes as he watched Carlos get off his bed, sketchbook in hand. "You always take your sketchbook with you?"

"Not always, Dr. Collins doesn't like my drawings," the short boy replied with a slight pout. "Well see you later."

The tall brunette gave him a small nod before he went back to staring at the glossy photos of his magazines muttering over how he wished he could look like the gaunt dead eyed, long limbed male models.

Carlos shook his head, dismissing the brunette's obsession with being skinny. To be quiet honest, he couldn't see what was wrong with the tall boy other than him being extremely OCD.

"Now you'll start off in isolation until you can be fully evaluated before being able to have a roommate," Mr. Bitters said to a petite chocolate girl with long dark hair.

Carlos was brought out of his musings as he watched the large man lead the chocolate skinned girl down the hall. When she looked up and made eyes contact with him, his heart felt like it had stopped, his skin felt like it had been set on fire and the air in his lungs had evaporated.

_Never_ in his life did he see such a beautiful girl.

"Her eyes are the same green color that Chromium looks like when it burns," he whispered to himself. '_She's so pretty.'_

"So Carlos, how are you feeling?" Dr. Collins asked she pulled out her leather Journal and Carlos seated himself onto her leather chair in her office.

The pyromaniac shrugged before looking at his sketchbook, thinking of the new girl he turned to a new page.

"I'm okay… did you know that there's a new girl here?" he asked with wide eyed curiosity.

"You've seen Alana? Well she'll be staying here… for a while," Dr. Collins replied writing down something into her journal. "I noticed you brought your sketchbook today, did you have a picture you wanted to show me?"

"No, I just wanted to draw," he answered sketching Alana's face._ 'I'll give this to her when I'm done.'_

The blond woman was silent for a few minutes ash she watched the boy furiously draw. Most of the boy's artwork tended to consist of people (including himself) being burned alive.

"Are you drawing one of the Jennifer's on fire again?" the doctor questioned as Carlos kept on drawing.

"No… I already drew them… I'm drawing Alana, she's much prettier," he said blushing slightly at hearing his own words.

Dr. Collins looked at the olive skinned boy in shock, not only was he not drawing something being consumed by fire and he had already shown a new interest in a girl who wasn't one of the Jennifer's. However, Alana wasn't a much better pick (_in fact she was worse…much worse_).

"It's not finished here's what I have of her so far," Carlos said interrupting the therapist's thoughts and note taking.

"Sure Carlos," she replied taking the drawing pad from the boy's tan hands and was pleasantly surprised at what she saw. "This is beautiful Carlos; do you plan on giving it to her?"

"I want to… but I'm scared she might not like me," he replied honestly taking his sketchbook from Dr. Collins. "She's just so… _beautiful_."

"I think you should, once she comes out of isolation," the doctor suggested as the boy closed his sketchbook. "Well, that's all for today, I'll see you tomorrow Carlos."

"Okay…bye Dr. Collins," he said giving the therapist a tiny wave and exited the office.

Carlos closed the door carefully and was surprised to see Alana standing there behind him.

"Oh…sorry… um, Hi I'm Carlos," he stuttered as he looked over her beautiful face.

"It's okay… I'm Alana; I have to talk to the "doctor"… I'll see you around," she said with a sweet smile and moved past him into Dr. Collin's office.

"Bye," he whispered as he stared at the closed door and then made his way back to his room clutching his sketchbook to him tightly.

Sitting back on his bed the raven haired boy opened up his sketchbook to the unfinished drawing of Alana and blushed, his thoughts suddenly consumed by the new girl.

"So how was therapy?" James' voice asked pulling Carlos out of his thoughts.

"Oh… it was okay, I saw the new girl… she's really pretty," he replied his blush deepening.

"Really, you got to see her, what does she look like?" the sandy haired boy asked with curious hazel eyes boring into him.

"I drew a picture of her… it's not done, but this is what she looks like," he said handing the other his drawing of the new girl. "Do you think I should give it to her?"

"I don't know, maybe when you see her at lunch or tomorrow," James said looking over the drawing. "She's gorgeous, does she seem nice?"

"I think so… but I didn't get time to talk to her, besides its dinner time," Carlos announced taking his sketchbook from James and gently placed it under his pillow.

"Yeah…dinner," James grimaced at the thought of having to eat.

He couldn't understand how the short boy could enjoy stuffing all those calories, carbs and saturated fat into his body. It was absolutely disgusting watching him and Kendall stuff food into their mouths, and what was more sickening was that they enjoyed it.

"I hate the food here," he commented as he and his roommate made their way to the cafeteria.

"What are you talking about? The food's actually pretty good," the shorter replied with an almost bewildered stare. "I just wish that I could work in the kitchen the way Dak and Jett get to.

"I'd hate to be around all that food," James said shuddering at the thought; he noticed in the corner of his eye that slightly annoyed look Carlos gave him.

He sighed knowing that neither Carlos nor the Jennifer's themselves couldn't comprehend his disgust for food. He wanted to be perfect (_and he couldn't do that with food sticking to his bones_).

Walking through the double doors and following the pyromaniac into the food line, he caught sight of the new girl with her tray of food walking to a far table away from everyone else.

"Carlos, what's the new girl's name?" he questioned the boy who was scooping chicken, broccoli and cheese onto his tray, the tall anorexic did his best not to barf at the smell of the food.

"Her name's Alana… why is she sitting alone?" Carlos said as he moved down the food line.

"_Alana_… I'll have the fish and salad... maybe she's shy," he said to the server and did his best to smile as the elderly woman handed him the tray of food and then acknowledged the shorter boy's question.

He noticed with disgust how he was given bread, and twice the amount of fruit that he asked for.

"Come on James, Logan and Kendall are waiting," the fire obsessed boy said bringing James out of his thoughts.

"Oh right," he muttered walking with Carlos to their usual table with Kendall (the skinny cutter who could eat everything and not gain one pound… James wondered if he should hate him for that) and Logan (the paranoid boy who's nightmares were scarier than that freak Ozzy).

Kendall looked up at them and smiled as they sat down; James noticed new pink scars on the blond's long arms. Feeling his stare Kendall pulled his sleeves down slightly embarrassed.

"Hey, did you know that we have a new girl here?" the blond asked still tugging on the sleeve of his flannel shirt.

"Yeah, Carlos got to talk to her," James replied, the pyromaniac just shrugged trying to act nonchalant despite the blush blooming on his cheeks.

"Her name's Alana," he said simply and began devouring his food.

"What do you think her affliction is?" Logan said his brown eyes curious and scared as he looked over his shoulder at the lonely girl.

"She doesn't look like… a match stick," Kendall said shamelessly staring at the girl. "I guess we'll find out later."

The other boys nodded and went back to eating (or James separating his food by texture and color and then dissecting his fish into tiny pieces), their minds were still focused on the new girl immensely curious about her and the reason(s) that brought her to the Palm Woods.

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><p><strong>Hope you all enjoyed that. Please leave me a review with your thoughts. xoxo<strong>


	2. Chapter 2

_This second chapter starts off with Alana and focuses more on her since she and Carlos are the more important characters of this story. Now to be clear Alana does know she has separate personalities, but like her personalities she is in denial that she has a problem, also she can "see" and talk to Elektra the blue eyed personality. And this is my take on DID (dissociative identity disorder), as well as others that the other characters have. So enjoy the chapter. :) Also this isn't a romance story as the story goes on you'll see what I mean._

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><p>"<em>Do you understand the charges you're being faced with?" Officer Ramazzotti asked his daughter sadness heavy in his green eyes.<em>

"_What charges, I don't know what you're talking about!" Alana protested irritated and confused to why she was sitting in an interrogation room._

"_Alana, there are parents of 10 kids your own age saying that you…. That you raped their children," her father said disbelief thick in his voice like molasses._

"_I've never had sex, let alone with 10 people," she argued her eyes turning dark, she felt herself shake and a migraine pinched the nerves of her eyes causing tears to roll down her cheeks_.

"_Sweetheart, just tell me what you did," he begged as he reached for her hand across the table._

"_Alana didn't do anything," the girl replied smacking her father's hand away, her eyes were fierce, angry and violent. They were also a bright vivid icy blue._

"_What… what are you talking about?" he looked confused as he looked into the face of his daughter but her eyes weren't hers. "Who are you?"_

"_I'm Elektra, and Alana didn't do anything… she's innocent," Elektra said fiercely crossing her arms over her shoulders._

_Elektra smirked sinisterly as Alana's father sat there confused, shocked and a little terrified._

"_This…this changes everything," he said getting up from the metallic chair and left the room._

**_{***}_**

Alana looked at the sign of the building she was supposed to be living in.

"Palm Woods… this looks fancy," she said to herself with a frown. She still had no idea why she here.

'_Don't you remember… they think you're crazy,_' the familiar voice in her head said to her, only this time she could see Elektra standing next to her.

"I'm not crazy… _you_ are," she muttered to the blue eyed girl not noticing that she had spoken to no one.

'_Shh, don't talk to me out loud, you look like a nut talking to air next to you_,' Elektra advised wrapping her arm around Alana's shoulder protectively.

"Right," she grunted to herself and made sure to keep her conversation with Elektra to herself.

"Now you'll start off in isolation until you can be fully evaluated before being able to have a roommate," Mr. Bitters, a portly man said to her in a tired voice as he led her down the main hall of the institution.

She made no commented as she adjusted the strap of her backpack following the large man. Looking up from the ground she caught sight of a Latin boy with jet black hair _(she guessed it was softer than the fur of a rabbit)_ and dark curious eyes. He stared at her intently as she walked past, a ghost of a smile flickered across her face as she walked past him and continued to her new room.

'_He's a cutie pie that one, you should talk to him_,' Elektra said sitting herself onto the small twin bed. Her blue eyes pierced Alana as the other packed her clothes into the small chest of drawers.

"He won't like me… I can't talk to him," Alana said a frown drawing itself onto her face.

'_Of course he will; he looked at you like you were god's gift to the earth,'_ Elektra replied getting off the bed. _'If you won't talk to him… then Chelsea will, and you don't want her all over that cute little Spanish boy do you?'_

"No… fine I'll say hi to him… or something," she huffed pulling a thick blue journal from her bag. "Now go away, I want to write before I have to talk to that therapist."

'_Always polite… bye Ally,_' Elektra said fading from Alana's vision back into the usual dark catacombs existing inside her mind.

Alana flinched and opened up her journal a blue pen rolling out of the spine. Uncapping the pen she wrote down an entry, hoping to calm down the nerves pulsing behind her eyes.

'_It's loud…too loud_,' she thought wincing slightly at migraine pulsing in her head.

Sighing she reached back into her bag and found the bottle of aspirin that she'd packed for her migraines, popping out two pills she swallowed them dry and looked at her watch.

"Time for therapy," she said to herself stuffing her journal back into her bag and exited her room.

She walked down the hall keeping her head down away from the hall lights that seemed brighter than they were before. Her migraine was still there, still pulsing behind her eyes, trying to shake the pain and fatigue from her head she bumped into someone. Embarrassed she looked up to see the Latin boy from before.

"Oh…sorry… um, Hi I'm Carlos," he stuttered as he looked over her face with wide eyes.

"It's okay… I'm Alana; I have to talk to the "doctor"… I'll see you around," she said with a sweet smile and moved past him into Dr. Collin's office.

"Bye," she heard him whisper as she stepped behind the therapist's door.

She wanted to giggle, Carlos was too adorable for words and he already had her curious to why he was here. But she'd have to put the darling olive skinned boy out of her mind as she sat down into Dr. Collins pristine office.

"So Alana, what do you think about being here?" Dr. Collins asked flipping a new page in her large black journal.

"It's okay I guess," she replied trying not to flinch under the pulsing migraine, the color in her eyes darkened and her shoulders relaxed.

"Alana… are you alright?" the therapist questioned looking to the girl curiously.

"Alana always gets head aches, I don't… I don't get head aches," she said looking up to Dr. Collins who was surprised seeing nearly black eyes instead of the vivid green from earlier.

"Oh… could you tell me your name please?" the blond woman inquired jotting down notes on Alana's disorder.

"Jasmine, but make sure you keep your blinds closed, Alana doesn't like lights, but it can't be too dark," Jasmine informed picking at the hangnail she found on her right hand.

"But why can't it be too dark?"

"Because… bad things happen in the dark," Jasmine replied and winced her eyes squeezing tightly as she sucked in a painful breath of air.

"Jasmine…?" Dr. Collins looked to the girl curiously as she clutched her head and whined, gasped in pain, then her shoulders relaxed again but quickly stiffed.

She straightened up, folded her arms and glared at the blond therapist, shocking ice blue eyes bore right into her.

"You're a real nosy lady you know," she said snidely, her glare strong and smoldering.

"Oh… and you are?" Dr. Collins asked seemingly unfazed by the sudden aggressive behavior.

"Elektra if you care," she replied turning her gaze to the book shelf lined with medical books and PhD's. "You think you can cure her? There's nothing wrong with her."

"You talk as if she's another person," the other female carefully replied as she wrote down more into her journal.

"She is, we're all different people, we just look the same… except for the eyes if you've noticed," Elektra said glancing back to the doctor.

"Well, I'd like to talk to more Elektra, but I kind of wanted to talk to Alana," Dr. Collins said looking over the file information of Elektra being "extremely violent".

"Fine, but she and I are getting hungry so could you make it quick?" she said pursing her lips, her entire disposition full of aggression and annoyance.

"… Since it is time for dinner you can go now," Dr. Collins said a tiny bit miffed by Elektra's curt behavior.

"I can go… but I didn't say anything?" Alana's polite voice said, her green eyes were full of confusion.

"It's fine don't worry, we can talk again tomorrow okay, you know where the cafeteria is don't you?" the therapist said making a mental note of how quickly she transitioned through personalities.

"Oh… okay and yeah… I guess I'll be going now, bye," she said getting up from the leather chair and out of the office.

'_She thinks you're nuts, she wants to make you "better" Ally_,' Elektra said walking the green eyed girl down the hall to the cafeteria.

"Shh, I'm trying to think," Alana said rubbing her temples as the pulsing behind her eyes came back.

She walked into the large cafeteria immediately feeling small and lonely as she always did back in her hometown. Flinching slightly she made it to the food line scooped some chicken, broccoli and cheese onto her tray as well as a slice of pizza and an apple. Grabbing a bottle of chocolate milk she made her way to an empty table fully aware of all the stares people were giving her.

'Just ignore them, just like school,' Elektra whispered from inside her head _(but her voice sounded like it was right next to her ear)_.

Keeping her head down she started eating only glancing up every now and then to catch glimpse of Carlos. When she did see him walking in front of a tall brunette he looked at her with such concern (a light blush dusting his cheeks) it made her look back down to her food flustered.

'_You should sit with him, his friends are cute_,' Elektra suggested with a wide grin.

'_No… I won't, they won't like me_,' she thought causing the other to pout slightly.

Alana flinched at the pain of her head ache and went back to eating her food in undisturbed silence.

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><p><em><strong>An update will come soon, the next chapter will focus more on Carlos and will have more interactions between him an Alana. Please review xoxo<strong>_


	3. Chapter 3

_Okay this story will have romance, I've decided as I was writing this chapter. Also as you will read on Jett and Dak are both Nymphomaniacs now this particular disorder can get out of hand when coupled with OCD or another mental disorder nor does this settle to one sexual orientation as you will read. Anyway Carlos' dream goes back to his obsession: fire, all of his fantasies will relate back to fire and Alana combining the two of them together. So I hope you enjoy this chapter and stay tuned for reviews._

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><p>Carlos sighed remembering what his mother said to him when his parents told him that he would be living at the Palm Woods.<p>

"_This people are going to make sure that you get better Carlos," she said patting his cheek and giving him a tight hug._

But Carlos didn't want to get better, he wanted _(needed)_ to feel that lovely flames against his tongue, he wanted them to fill his throat and singe his lungs; he wanted those beautiful flames caressing and destroying his body. Carlos just wanted to _burn_.

Yet here he was wide awake looking at the ceiling of his room in the middle of the night unable to sleep; Logan's usual screams over his nightmares (who shared a room with Kendall at the opposite end of the hall) were still fresh in his mind. Truth be told he was a little terrified of the howls that would come from Logan and Kendall's room during the night and often he wondered went on inside the nerdy boy's paranoid head.

He would hate it if his dreams made him so scared to go to sleep and even be awake for that matter. But his mind went back to Alana, the new girl who looked so perfect and beautiful (_like the flames of the sun_); hopefully tomorrow he could talk to her.

Maybe he'd show her his drawing; maybe he'd tell her that she was _beautiful_, and absolutely _**perfect**_.

Sudden images of the green eyed girl lighting his body on fire made his eyes flutter and his entire body shake and sweat pricked the surface of his skin. He did his best not to gasp too loud as he got flustered over the miniature fantasies that flashed through his mind, he didn't want to disturb James who was sleeping soundly in his own bed.

"She's so pretty," he mumbled to himself finally feeling sleep pulling at him.

Letting out a muffled yawn Carlos snuggled against his pillows letting his eyes close heavily.

"_Carlos… Carlos," a familiar beautiful voice whispered into the Latino's ear. "Wake up."_

_Opening his brown eyes in confusion he saw Alana looking down at him with a beautiful smile on her face (and Carlos swore for a moment that her skin glowed and flickered like fire)._

"_Alana… what are you doing here?" he whispered softly extremely elated by her presence yet still baffled._

"_Because I wanted to see you," she replied softly straddling him causing a scarlet blush to bloom to his cheeks at noticing her tang top and short-shorts._

"_W… Wh… What are you…" his voice broke in a small squeak as she gave him a seductive smile._

"_Shh… you know you want this as much as I do," she purred in a whispery way then kissed the pyromaniac passionately._

_He groaned feeling his entire body quake with lust and desire as her fingers twisted into his hair and her body pressed to his; he felt as if he had been set on fire. When their lips broke for air, he smiled tasting ash and smoke while tiny flames danced and burned inside her bright eyes._

"_But wait… won't James hear us?" he questioned suddenly his eyes wide with worry._

"_There's no one here, it's just you and me," she answered giving the boy another mouth watering kiss. "Do you want more?"_

_He nodded eagerly as he threw his blankets away and wasn't in the least bit peeved that the colors in her eyes changed from blue to gold then back to green._

"_You're warm… like fire," he groaned out as she bit into his neck harshly, the hickies left on his skin reminded him of the burns he used to create on his skin with erasers._

"_I am fire," she said into his ear softly as her skin, hair and eyes quickly turned to flames._

"_So beautiful," he gasped noticing that his skin too was turning into fire._

_Their clothes burned away into ash (much to Carlos' own ecstasy) and so did the bed, wall, floor and the ceiling. But it didn't matter, not as much as Alana's burning kisses and scorching touches to his body did._

_Together their bodies became engulfed in flames as their passions grew stronger and wider. Just as he was about to kiss her, Alana's mouth opened, but instead of words a loud screech came out._

"Carlos…Carlos get up man! And shut this stupid thing off!" James said shaking the other awake.

Groggily he found the off button on his alarm clock and shut it off. Slowly sitting up the raven haired boy rubbed his eyes pouted, then glared at the taller boy.

"You and that stupid clock ruined my dream," he said with a pout and turned his gaze to his lap. "It was a good dream too."

"Oh… what was it about?" James asked as he combed his hair then combed it back over again.

"It was about… never mind it sounds dumb," Carlos said clenching his sheets into his hands tightly as a light blush bloomed to his tan skin.

"With that blush on your face I'd say it was the exact opposite of dumb," James said with a knowing smirk.

The other simply blushed deeper and got out of his bed glad to notice that there was no evidence of his "excitement" over his dream, sighing he grabbed his towel and a fresh change of clothes.

"I'll be right back… shower and stuff," he said quickly leaving the room and headed down the hall to the showers.

Clutching the things he'd need for his shower he nervously looked around making sure that Jett and Dak weren't close by. Nymphomaniacs like them tend to get excited by the sight of naked skin, and what scared Carlos more was how eager and desperate the two of them were to get into his or anyone else's pants.

"Hey Carlos, looking good today?" Jett's voice called to the short raven haired boy who looked at him with mild disgust.

"Shut up you creep!" Carlos hissed at the blond, the Latino could already tell that the taller male was already in one of his "moods".

"Aww come on, aren't we friends?" the other leered eyeing the shorter boy whilst licking his lips hungrily.

"No we're not, now back off," Carlos replied gruffly as he made his way to the private shower stalls and quickly slipped inside and locked the door.

"Fine, be that way," Jett called out, the Latino could hear the pout in sex-addict's voice.

Carlos waited until he heard two sets of footsteps exit and a door to the showers swing shut.

"Finally," he whispered to himself as he set his clothes onto the far side of the stall and turned the shower on making sure the water was scalding hot.

He stepped under the steaming spray moaning softly at the way the water seemed to boil his skin. Sighing he lathered up, his mind drifting back to Alana and the dream he had from last night. The images danced behind his had lidded eyes and he licked his lips as his throat went dry.

"Hmm…so beautiful," he muttered to himself as he began to wash his hair, his eyelids fluttered slightly when he recognized that familiar flush of lust roll through his body like a wild fire, the feeling that clenched his heart and pressed against his groin.

Rinsing out his hair, Carlos stood in the hot shower gulping as he listened for anyone else around it'd been a while since he'd gotten an urge that actually needed him to _handle_.

After his shower Carlos made his way down the hall clutching his sketchbook tightly against his chest. With a little bit of sneaking about he'd managed to find Alana's room and to his delight she wasn't that from the room that he shared with James. Now he stood before her door excitement and nervousness coiling in the pit of his stomach, exhaling deeply he gathered his courage and knocked on the brown plywood door.

"Oh… Hi, Carlos right?" her voice spoke coiling around him like the boa constrictor his brother used to have.

"Um hi… I…um, I drew this for you," he stuttered opening up his sketchbook, took the now finished drawing out gently and handed her the drawing.

Nervously he watched her expression as she looked over his artwork; the young pyromaniac noted how her eyes went from green, to blue to gold then back to green, just like in his dream.

"Do you like it?" he asked pressing the drawing pad to his chest, his brown eyes looking at her shyly as a soft blush dusted his olive toned skin.

"I love it, thank you… no one's ever given me something so beautiful," she replied sincerely as she leaned forward and gave the boy a soft kiss to his cheek.

"Oh...yo…you're-welcome, um bye Alana," he stuttered his entire body flushing with heat as he looked down to the floor.

"You can call me Aly, bye Carlos," she said gently and couldn't help but smile as he looked up at her with wide doe brown eyes.

"You're really pretty," he replied before walking quickly down the hall.

"Thank you," she muttered warmth blooming to her cheeks as she closed her door to further exam the drawing.

"James! James! James! She liked it; she liked the drawing I gave her!" Carlos loudly declared at he jumped onto the taller boy's bed.

"Ack! Carlos slow down, who are you talking about?" he asked looking to the pyro curiously as the shorter male bounced across the room to his own bed.

"Alana, the new girl; she liked the picture I drew her, she said it was beautiful and she kissed my cheek," Carlos relayed his blush darkened as he remembered the feel of her warm lips pressing to his cheek.

"Oh my god! Carlos you've got a crush on her!" James gasped sitting next to the smaller boy a wide grin plastered on his face.

"No I don't!" the other loudly denied as the heat to his face only increased.

Alana stared at the portrait of herself with a soft smile on herself; gently she set the drawing on her desk as if it were burst into ashes.

'_I think he likes you, should have seen how red his cheeks got when you kissed his cheek,'_ Elektra said giggling leaning into Alana as she looked at the drawing. _'I bet he dreams about you too.'_

"No he doesn't… he doesn't like me like that," Alana denied feeling that familiar pain behind her eyes and winced.

'_It's obvious, poor thing was a stuttering mess when you looked at him,'_ Elektra said turning Alana to face her_. 'Trust me on this.'_

"Okay," the green eyed girl said with a sigh as she sat down on her bed, the pain behind her eyes fading.

Looking up she sighed noticing that Elektra was no longer around her, setting her eyes back to the drawing she smiled a tiny wave of heat flushing to her cheeks.

"Thanks Carlos," she whispered thinking of the blushing Latino fondly.

Maybe he could be her angel that would save her from the hell that she's been living in.

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><p><strong>An update will come soon, stay tuned mean while please leave reviews! xoxo<strong>


	4. Chapter 4

_**AN:** Okay so I've got somethings in store for this story and I hope you'll enjoy them when they come up. :) And this chapter contains more CarlosxAlana interactions and there will be more of them in future chapters as well as her interacting with the other boys. And one of Alana's personalities makes an appearance. The next update will be soon. Enjoy this chapter!_

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><p>Alana clutched her journal to herself tightly as she gingerly walked into the brightly colored room full of chairs. She saw Carlos sitting next to that tall beautiful brunette she's seen him walk into the cafeteria on her first day here.<p>

'_Go sit with them!'_ Elektra prodded poking her in the back roughly.

'_No… I can't!'_ Alana thought chewing her lip and glanced at the Latino who was animatedly talking to the brunette.

She slowly made her way deeper into the room hoping the boy wouldn't notice her but the skittish raven haired boy she'd remembered seeing nudged the blond next to him who also looked at her with pained green eyes; both boys turned to the Latino who gazed at her with those wide excited doe brown eyes.

"Aly! Come sit with us!" Carlos all but yelled to the chocolate girl excitedly patting the empty chair beside him.

"Oh okay…" she replied giving the boy a gratefully but nervous smile as she made her way past the other empty seats and sat next to the beaming boy.

"Aly I want you to meet my friends. This is James, that's Logan and Kendall's the broody one," the caramel colored boy said introducing the boys who waved politely to Alana.

"Hi, it's nice to meet you," she replied feeling her throat instantly dry at three pairs of eyes staring at her intently.

Carlos smiled brightly at her once again, making Alana feel like she was being warmed by a tiny sun, the lump in throat melted letting her breathe a little easier.

"So what are we supposed to do here?" she asked focusing on the caramel boy's excited brown eyes.

"This is group therapy it's where we talk about our feelings," the Latino explained rolling his eyes dramatically.

"Oh… does everyone have to talk?" the petite girl inquired her nervousness setting in deeply.

"No… Kendall and James never talk," Carlos replied as he bravely reached for her hand taking hold of it gently.

Alana's heart raced rapidly as the raven haired boy's soft hand engulfed hers into a comforting pocket of warmth. A smile bloomed to her face as she looked at his blushing countenance.

"Your hand is soft," she whispered to him feeling some of her shyness evaporate.

"Yours is warm," he whispered back a bashful smile drawing itself onto his face.

It seemed for that tiny moment that the world had melted away and only its smoldering embers were left as evidence. They scooted their chairs a little closer to each other, their fingers twisting into each other's desperately as they sat next to each other, the 3 boys next to them and the other patients filing into the room went unnoticed.

"Hey guys you can flirt later, the "healing process" is going to start," James said breaking the two teens back into reality.

"Oh...right," the pair muttered as they reluctantly let their hands slip away from their previous entanglement.

A pretty African American woman with long dark hair stood before the room full of teenagers as a tall dark haired woman with piercing blue eyes stood next to her, both had wide smiles on their faces.

"The black lady's name is Kelly, she's really nice and the one with the scary blue eyes is Heather… she's interesting," Carlos said softly as he leaned into Alana his lips pressing gently against the shell of her ear.

'_But will they make me talk?'_ she thought biting onto her lip gazing at the two women who stood in front of the room which felt so much smaller.

"Hello everyone, as you can see we have someone new to group, Alana could you introduce yourself please?" Kelly said her sparkling smile shone brighter than all the stars in the sky almost blinding the petite girl into oblivion.

"Ugh…hi, my name's Alana, I like to paint and write… I used to play the piano," the green eyed girl said giving all who had turned to stare at her with wide curious a nervous wave.

"Okay, now Alana since you're new you don't have to talk unless you want to," Kelly said with a kind smile as she looked back to the other patients in the room. "Now who would like to start today?"

"I would!" a blond boy said arrogantly as he stood up from his chair near the front of the room.

"Jett you always want to talk about yourself, why don't we let Alana talk," Logan suggested in an uncharacteristically assertive voice.

The raven haired boy squirmed slightly with everyone's shocked scrutiny and Jett's combination of lust and aggression seeping from his ocean blue eyes.

"I think that's a very good idea, Alana why don't you start?" Heather asked her eyes full of curiosity.

"Um… I don't know what to say, what am I supposed to tell you?" the petite girl inquired clutching her journal to her chest as if it would shield her from the woman's prying eyes.

"I see you've got a journal with you… you could tell us something about that," Kelly suggested giving Heather a stern look.

"Okay… the journal's just… just something that doesn't matter, besides it's not like you care," Alana said her shoulders tensing as she looked up at both of the woman standing in front of the room.

The two of them both gasped their eyes widening at the girl's vicious snarl and cold blue eyes glaring at them intently. Kelly gulped quickly gathering herself while Heather still seemed slightly perplexed by the girl sitting next to the young pyromaniac who looked at her with wide eyes.

"Aly… it's okay if you don't want to talk," Carlos said softly hesitantly rubbing the girl's arm, before Alana was like the tiny flickering flame of a candle, but now she was like the roaring flames of a forest fire.

He half expected her to look to him with aggression and rage in her green eyes, but like everyone else in the room he was surprised to see shockingly blue eyes staring at him.

"Okay… Alana was getting scared anyway, poor thing was about to have a panic attack… I'm Elektra by the way," Elektra replied with a smirk but whispered the last into the young pyro's ear.

"Hi…um… can Alana come back now?" the Latino asked softly as Jett began to talk loudly about himself.

"Sure… she really likes you by the way," Elektra whispered with a wink and winced, her hands clutching the dark blue journal as her shoulders relaxed and then leaned back in the chair.

"Aly… are you okay?" he looked to her with concern brewing in his eyes as the girl next to him breathed heavily as if she'd just been brought up from the deep end of a pool.

"Yeah, I'm fine," she mumbled giving him a tiny smile. "What happened?"

"Nothing, don't worry about it," he reassured her taking her hand in his again and gave it a gentle squeeze.

'_He's really cute, he didn't get scared of me like all the other boys,'_ Elektra whispered to Alana and poked her in the side. _'And I don't think those counselors are going to make you talk anymore.'_

'_What did you do?' _Alana thought looking down to her lap and tried her best to ignore the pulsing migraine beating against her skull.

'_Nothing that would make anyone think any less of you,'_ Elektra replied with a smirk as she faded from Alana's side view.

"Well everyone I think that's enough for today, you all can go to your activities or study hall," Kelly said breaking Alana out of her thoughts.

"Where are you going to next?" James asked surprising Alana with his direct question.

"The Doctor said I was supposed to go to either art, music or to the library," she replied as the boys all stood up, Carlos pulling her up with them.

"Come to art, Logan and I are going there next," Carlos suggested excitedly his hand twisting tightly with hers.

"Okay, that sounds fun," she replied with a wide smile as the caramel skinned boy gazed at her with pure adoration and happiness.

"Awesome, let's go Logie, see you guys at lunch," Carlos chirped giving James and Kendall a blinding smile as he pulled Alana out the room with him.

"Does he even know anything about her?" Kendall asked the tall brunette next to him as he, James and Logan stepped out of the room.

"No, but he obviously likes her a lot and she likes him," the hazel eyed boy replied with a slight shrug.

"But did you notice how she changed… like she shifted into another person?" Logan said with a curious look on his face. "I think she might have DID…"

"DID? That's cool, maybe you should let Carlos know, and I think he's waiting for you," the blonde said pulling on the sleeve of his sweater with James nodding in agreement.

"Yeah I think I should… anyway I'll see you guys later," the raven haired boy said walking down the hall to where Carlos had run off to with Alana.

"Bye Logan," both the taller boys said turning in the opposite direction to their respected therapies.

Yet what Logan didn't realize was that Carlos was perfectly aware of the other personalities that lived behind Alana's bright green eyes. He simply chose to act as if they weren't real; it was almost as if he understood just how the petite girl's mind worked. But at the moment her disorder didn't matter, what mattered was getting the girl an easel next to his.

"You'll like the art teacher, he's real weird, but he's awesome," Carlos said with a grin reluctantly letting go of the girl's hand to let her wander around the art room.

"Okay… did you paint the ones with fire in them, they're beautiful," she said looking at one of the large painted canvases with flames consuming an entire house.

"Thanks, everyone else thinks they're weird," the Latino said with a bashful smile.

"Everyone's weird, and you're welcome," she replied leaning to give him a gentle kiss on the cheek.

The two smiled at each other as they walked back to their easels just as the other patients selected for art therapy strolled through the door. Both of them felt a gentle warmth bloom in their hearts like a tiny fire sparking to life.

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><p><em><strong>Leave me some reviews please! Next update will be soon. xoxo<strong>_


	5. Chapter 5

_**AN: **Okay I finally have my motivation back, and I'm sorry for keeping you all waiting for the update of this story. I'll be getting back to my regular writing schedule as of now. This chapter opens differently focusing on another character in this story Kendall, the original focus of this fic. Now what I plan on doing is opening with a flashback of sorts for other characters in this story mostly involving James, Kendall, Logan, Carlos, and Alana. These flashbacks or dream sequences will be a gateway to understand the disorder that each of these characters have better. Also the relationship between Carlos and Alana will grow as this fic continues. Hope you all enjoy the chapter. _

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><p>"<em>Katie! Where are you? I got you some ice cream," Kendall called out to his baby sister letting the front door slam shut behind him.<em>

_Tossing his backpack and jacket to the floor in a pile he made his way to the kitchen still calling out the pre-teen girl's name._

"_Katie…Noah where's Katie?" his green eyes were wide, his right hand clutching the plastic bag containing Katie's favorite ice cream. _

"_Who's Katie? Who are you?" the large man twitched his eyes bleary, the younger male noticed blood staining Noah's hands._

_Panic rose in his chest like a roaring fire, dropping the plastic bag to the kitchen floor and raced up the stairs, his heart hammering with each step._

"_Katie! Katie are you…" stumbling through the doorway the 10 year old's bedroom to find her tiny body sprawled on her bed, blood splattered everywhere. Bile rose in his throat as he took in the scene before him. "Oh my god, Katie! Oh my god! Oh… Jesus, please me alive. Katie!"_

_Taking her from the bed to the floor, the now shaking teen easily saw that his baby sister was dead. Tears fell from his jade eyes as a sob made his body convulse violently, through his bleary eyes he looked back to Katie's pale face, her entire body cold in his arms; a tiny fire of rage began to build in his gut._

"_Noah, he did this to you, didn't he baby sister? Don't worry, he'll pay for what he did," his words heavy like lead on his tongue. "He'll be sorry." _

_The moments after flew in front of Kendall's eyes as if everything had be put on fast forward almost as if it were a VHS tape. By the time his mother got home from work, his hands were drenched in blood; Noah was on the kitchen floor his chest heaving slightly. His mother had screamed throttling him out of his daze as police sirens sounded in the distance._

"_Kendall what did you do?" she'd shrieked, her brown eyes full of horror and confusion._

"_He killed Katie, mommy, Katie's dead and it's my entire fault," tears fell from his eyes again as he looked down to the blood sticking to his flesh._

Carlos watched Kendall as they sat at their usual table in study hall, the blond was picking at an old scab on his arm desperately. The boy knew he should warn his friend that he could get an infection, but he knew the other wouldn't care.

"Hey Kendall, what'cha thinking about?" Carlos asked his eyes worriedly, and noticing how the other's nails kept on pecking at his skin.

"My mom came to visit me," he replied simply green eyes fixated on his pale arm. "She wanted to talk about Katie again."

The shorter boy twisted his hands together, unsure of how he should continue the conversation knowing how the blonde felt about talking about his deceased baby sister.

"Well, what about Katie did she want to talk to you about?" he flinched when Kendall's fingers became covered in blood, the scab tissue lifting off his arm slowly.

"Just the usual stuff, the police still want to know about... Noah," the taller boy's nails dug into his bleeding scab making the existing cut larger. "Ugh, Dammit!"

"Nurse! Kendall's bleeding, again," he ignored the glare that the slender boy gave him as he was encircled by nurses who were quickly working to stop the bleeding and disinfect the wound.

Before the blond could protest the nurses whisked him out of the library, Carlos guessed to the infirmary to increase the strength of his medication. He shivered at the thought of having his mouth forcibly held open and pills shoved down his esophagus.

Going back to his sketchbook the olive skinned boy failed to notice the tension floating heavily in the library like smog, his fingers trembled as the images of his friend thrashing on one of the thin white cots his voice going hoarse from screaming his protests against being sedated.

"Carlos, what happened to Kendall?" Logan questioned his voice soft as he sat next to the shivering pyromaniac.

"He was picking at a scab on his arm, then he started talking about Katie and his mom, he made the cut on his arm bleed more, it was…" his voice faltered with the image of the blond's blood flashing behind his eyes.

"Oh, I see. He's always trying to hurt himself," the fair skinned male commented while opening a book he'd brought with him.

"Do you think it's about Katie or Noah?" Carlos looked to the other with wide curious eyes since Logan was the more knowledgeable of the two.

"Honestly, I don't know, he won't ever talk to me."

A blanket of silence fell over the both of them; their eyes looked to the empty seats that the taller boys usually occupied.

"Where's James? He's usually here writing in the book of his," Logan looked to Carlos to see the shorter had gone back to drawing in his sketchbook.

"I think he's in food therapy or something," he shrugged since he hadn't paid the tall brunette much attention, his mind was more focused on things.

Making a smile noise of recognition, the sleep deprived teen looked to his novel not bothering to ask what the pyro was currently drawing.

'_I bet he's drawing that Alana girl again,' _Logan looked at the fire bug with tired calculating eyes before letting a soft sigh leave his lips. He knew that no matter what he said, the Latino would only get more consumed with the unstable girl.

Carlos breathed the warm air into his lungs as he walked around the Palm Woods park grounds. His mind felt foggy as he took the trail that lead him towards the back of the institution's building.

"Hey Carlos," Alana greeted the energetic artist softly from behind; she almost jumped at how quickly he turned around to face her.

"Oh, hi Aly, I didn't know you get to come outside," he smiled brightly at the green eyed girl. "Do you want to walk with me?"

"I'd love to," she smiled back, her heart fluttered like the wings of a humming bird when the boy took a gentle grasp of her hand. Her entire body felt warmed as she walked closely with the raven haired boy.

'_You know what you should do? You should kiss him, right on that perfect little mouth of his,'_ Elektra suggested as she poked the timid girl in her side. 'I know you want to.'

'_Shut up and leave me alone,'_ Alana thought desperately, wincing at the sudden throbbing pain behind her eyes, her fingers dug into the hand she was holding subconsciously as a soft pained whine left her mouth.

"Aly, is there something wrong? Does your head hurt?" he stopped walking to look her in the eyes intently, a worried expression took over his once happy face.

Alana looked to the caramel skinned boy nervously; the words she wanted to say were tangled and heavy against her throat. Her green eyes were wide and suddenly looked to her feet feeling ashamed for not being able to have the guts to say what she wanted to say.

_'Why bother say it, just do it, he won't mind,'_ Elektra whispered to her and poked her back roughly. _'Don't be such a fraidy cat.'_

"Aly, are you okay? You look like you could use a hug," Carlos softly said as he closed the gap between them, he bit his lip as he moved his hand to touch her chin and lift it up so her eyes were finally looking back into his.

"I'm fine Carlos, really I am," she felt her heart flutter from the contact, heat rose to her skin as the boy stepped closer his brown eyes piercing right through her.

"You don't look fine, please Aly, you can tell me," he pleaded resting his forehead again hers.

Their lips brushed against each other and a warm spark seemed to ignite between them. Carlos inhaled pleasantly surprised by the feeling, but he still wanted to know what had Alana so upset.

"Please Aly," he pressed his lips to hers softly, a roaring fire blazing in his gut as she kissed him back with a tiny bit more force.

Their lips parted and he gazed at her slightly dazed, chewing his lip he moved his hands down to hers engulfing them tightly in his own.

"I just… it's nothing, I'm fine now," she stumbled over her words still trying to understand what had just happened. "Why'd you kiss me?"

"Because I like you," he shrugged not fully sensing what the kiss implied to the small girl.

"Do you kiss all the girls you like?"

"No, just you… did I do something wrong?" nerves suddenly coiled against the muscles of his stomach beating against the organ like tiny fists.

"Of course not, I'm just surprised that's all," her words were half true, but she didn't want to go into her own muddled thoughts trying to decipher why her body didn't react the way it normally did.

"So, I can kiss you again?"

"Yes Carlos, you can kiss me again," she giggled at the wide childish grin that broke out on his face, it was breathtaking to watch any expression cross his face.

Without waiting for any other kind of conformation from Alana, the raven haired boy pulled the girl into his arms tightly burying his face deep into her thick hair and inhaled her smell. He moved some of the dark strands from her face, the warm LA air tousling her long locks.

"You're beautiful," he whispered pressing his lips to hers passionately before she could reply.

The kiss sent a fire blazing through their bodies that seemed to steal the oxygen in their lungs, not that either of them minded. Their lips moved against each other's easily as they clung together as if they'd be torn apart by some unseen force. When the need for air became an issue the pair separated taking in tiny gasps of air, their intense gaze never faltering.

"I- I think I love you," Alana gulped still trying to get her breathing back to normal.

"I love you too," Carlos breathed giving her a soft peck to her lips.

The both of them smiled at each other, the world seeming to burn to ashes around them.

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><p><strong>Please leave a review with your thoughts, comments and critques. Updates will come soon! xoxo<strong>


	6. Chapter 6

_**AN**: This chapter goes in deeper to Alana's disorder while introducing Logan's which is Night Terror disoder. As this story goes on I want to emphasize the bonds that grow between Kendall, Carlos and Alana then I'll develop the ones Alana has with Logan and James. Also if you read notice, the creation for Alana's final personality named Chelsea is hinted. PM me if you think you know why she exists. I'm really excited to continue writing this story since this particular idea has been rolling around my brain for quite some time. Any comments, concerns, critiques and reviews are welcome within reason. Enjoy the chapter, an update will come soon!_

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><p>"<em>Come on Aly, don't act like you don't like it," his voice was warm against her skin sending a shiver down her spine.<em>

_The young girl thrashed under the man above her trying her hardest to wiggle out of his tight grip._

"_You can't leave me yet Aly," he purred kissing her neck tenderly; tears of fear and hate were still trickling down her cheeks. "You're so beautiful… it's a shame we're related."_

_His eyes were full of lust and hunger as he took in her exposed body, licking his lips he grinned perversely, the girl under him began desperately pleading with him, her words only seemed to fan the flames of his growing lust._

"_Please Michael, please don't do this," she gasped as a sob steadily built in her throat. "You're supposed to be my brother."_

"_And I wished I wasn't," he growled his dark eyes getting a sinister look in them._

_Before another plea could leave her lips, her half brother violently pushed himself inside her. Pain radiated through her entire body as he brutally ravaged her. The screams leaving her mouth were cut short when his hands wrapped around her neck._

"**No!"**

Alana gasped as her body bolted upright in her bed, her muscles spasmed slightly as her heart hammered in her chest. Taking in large gulps of air, she looked next to her to find her white stuffed rabbit; grabbing it she held it to herself making sure to bury her face into the rabbits head hoping it would give her some kind of comfort.

'_That rabbit didn't help you __**then**__, and it won't help you now,' _Elektra scowled her blue eyes glared harshly at the white rabbit.

"Shut up!" Alana snarled back holding the stuffed animal tighter.

She needed to feel warm and safe after seeing his face. And with every frantic beat of her heart she wished she was engulfed in Carlos' warmth the way she was yesterday in the park. Her face flushed at the thought of being cuddled up with the energetic boy, her heart pounded loudly in her ears and for all the right reasons now.

"No! Stop, please! Just leave me alone!" a sharp scream pierced through her thoughts sending a tiny wave of panic over her.

'_Looks like someone else is __**dreaming**__ up their own Michael,'_ Elektra sighed her blue eyes staring intently at the door.

"That's doesn't sound like a dream, dreams don't make you how like a dying wolf," Alana softly muttered still gripping her rabbit tightly.

_Logan stumbled over the leafy floor of the forest as he ran for his life from the figure behind him. His throat was raw like it had been grated by sandpaper, his heart pounded in his chest, his entire body was full of adrenaline and fear as he kept on running as fast as he could._

"_You'll never get away Logan," the figure hissed, his raspy voice seeming to come from everywhere._

"_Just leave me alone!" he wailed not looking over his shoulder with tears mapping their way down his flushed cheeks._

_His legs felt like they were on fire, but he didn't dare to stop and catch his breath, because it may be the last breath he'd ever take. But as his feet slapped against the forest floor everything around him turned black as if all the trees, rocks, dirt and leaves were smudged together by a giant paintbrush._

_"Why won't you leave me alone?" he shrieked into the blackness surrounding him when he finally stopped running._

_His legs felt as if they would collapse under him, his vision blurred, he felt so perfectly helpless. __**But he was always helpless in his nightmares.**_

_"No! Go away!" he yelled, his heart seemed to be inside his throat as he managed to shake himself from its grip._

_The figure before him loomed over him, its body seemed to be made of only bones, a thing layer of metallic skin stretched tight over its long bones and hollowed, sunken face, the smile was full of sharp wolfish teeth and the eyes were red like blood._

_"What's the matter Logan, are you scared?" it sneered at him hungrily leaning down towards the fear-struck boy in front of him. "Don't worry, soon you won't feel anything."  
>"No! Stop! Just leave me alone!" he screamed as his vision grew dark, the creature's jagged fangs were bright as stars in the night sky.<em>

The raven haired boy thrashed around violently in his bed, his roommate Kendall having had his own bought of fitful sleep was now sound asleep, his mind deep in dreamland, a subconscious world that Logan wished with all his heart he could enter.

"Go away! Stop it- NO!" he kept on screaming until large orderlies burst into the room just as they did almost every night. "He's going to kill me!"

The fair skinned boy struggled against the large men lifting him from his bed and carried his still screaming form to the infirmary. His sleeping medication never seemed to be strong enough to keep his monsters locked inside the dark catacombs of his mind.

Alana stood in her doorway clutching her rabbit watching the scene play out before her with wide curious eyes. She wondered what monsters plagued the raven haired boy, and she wanted to know if those monsters were the reason why he looked so terrified every time she saw him.

'_Maybe, he's just like you,'_ Elektra whispered poking her right between her shoulder blades.

"Logan always has those night mares, but he says they're never exactly the same," Kendall's soft yet strong voice broke her from her musings.

She looked at the slender blond, noticing the bandage on his arm, she felt her existing curiosity burn more.

"Oh… what happened to your arm?"

Kendall took in her curious expression and the tight grip she had on a stuffed rabbit with floppy ears being held securely against her chest. He didn't feel the need to become defensive or rude, instead he felt a desire to tell her anything any everything about himself and the panicky boy he roomed with.

"I pulled at a scab on my arm, I dug my nails into it," the words fell off his tongue easily which surprised him.

"Did it hurt?" she cocked her head to the side, she wanted to walk over and touch the bandage covering the scarred skin underneath, but her feet stayed glued to where they were.

'_Of course it hurt, anything that bleeds hurts,' _Elektra sneered rolling her eyes at Alana. _'You of all people should know that.'_

She flinched at the comment which didn't go unnoticed by the boy standing across the hall from her.

"Not in the way it's supposed to. I kind of like blood," he shrugged then leaned into the hall looking for the night nurse. "I guess the nurses are still trying to calm Logan down."

'_He likes blood? I think I like him,' _Elektra purred peering around Alana to get a better look at the self-harmer with a primal hunger brimming in her ice blue eyes.

"Does Logan talk about his nightmares?" she didn't know why she was so at ease with the blond whose emerald eyes studied her with innocent curiosity.

"Not all the time, if he tries to in group he gets a panic attack and clings to anyone around," he toed the carpet at the edge of the door frame, information about him and his roommate easily leaving his mouth.

"Oh, I get blackouts sometimes, I can't remember anything before or afterwards," she didn't know why she'd said that, but there wasn't a shred of regret tingling under her skin.

"That happens to me too," he smiled at her feeling a sense of companionship blooming between them.

She smiled back at him, her heart hammered loudly in her ears at the sight of his dimpled smile. He didn't radiate the exact kind of warmth that Carlos did, but she did feel a tiny wave of it wash over her.

'_He's such a cutie. Why don't you take him for a ride?' _a flirty voice whispered to her making the warmth in her turn ice cold.

'_Shut up Chelsea, you stupid __**slut**__!'_ Elektra hissed rubbing Alana's back in a comforting gesture. _'Don't listen to her, she's just horny.'_

"Well, I'll talk to you tomorrow, Goodnight Kendall," she didn't know how she didn't flinch at Chelsea's arrival, but she was glad that the blond didn't notice.

"Goodnight Alana," he replied with another wide smile, before he turned around and went back into his room.

She watched him close the plywood door then close the door to her own room. The warm feeling came back and started coiling low in her belly.

'_Carlos will be glad, you're making nice with his friend,'_ Elektra smiled wide and patted her head gently.

Alana's cheeks flushed thinking of Carlos, she wondered if he was dreaming of her this very moment. The warmth in the pit of her stomach reached higher, slithering its way into her throat, leaning against her pillows, she turned on her side letting dreamland pull her in again.

"_Wake up Aly, you can't sleep forever," _Michael's voice slithered into her ears as if he were hovering over her body.

Gasping, she bolted upright in her bed throwing the scratchy sheets off her, a cold chill ran through her body which shook out of panic and repressed fear.

"I wish I could just forget his face," she whispered and managed to get up without collapsing.

She rubbed her neck feeling the skin underneath her hand tingle, for a moment it felt like large fingers were pressing against her throat-

'_No time for daydreaming, you've got therapy with Dr. Collins, she'll want you to talk about Michael, because she's __**helping**__ you,'_ Elektra spoke suddenly making sure to roll her eyes at the psychiatrist's name.

Neglecting to respond Alana opened her chest of drawers and pull out clothes she'd wear for the day.

'_Make sure you show a little skin, Carlos might like that,'_ Chelsea giggled from her spot on the furniture.

'_Leave her alone you whore, she doesn't need your advice,'_ the blue eyed persona snarled to the golden eyed one who made her way over to the bed.

'_Come now Elektra, you know how shy she is, I'm just trying to help is all,'_ Chelsea smirked while ice blue eyes glared at her fiercely.

"Will you both shut up?" Alana shouted suddenly falling to her knees and clutching her head.

Slivers of conversations rushed in and out of her ears while her head pounded viscously, the nerves behind her eyes pinching with enough force to make her dizzy. Tears trickles down her cheeks as her head pained her, the voices of her arguing personalities clashing like gladiators inside her skull.

"Shut up, shut up!" she chanted softly, rocking herself back and forth as the pain slowly ebbed away.

Exhaling a deep breath she got up after the throbbing left her mind and body, taking out a fresh change of clothes from the open drawer, she paced herself still feeling a little shaky from the migraine.

"I wish they wouldn't always fight," she whispered to herself and left her room when she was finally dressed.

Shifting on the leather chair, Alana felt her stomach twist with nerves as she twisted her fingers together while Dr. Collins looked through the medical portion of her file. A sense of dread clung to her skin and hair like a thick cloud of black smoke.

"Well Alana, I was looking at your medical information and it says that you've been to the emergency room quite a number of times," the psychiatrist stated closing the manila folder briefly to look into her patient's bright green eyes. "Do you mind telling me why?"

'_Don't say anything, she only wants you to talk about __**him**__, you remember? That disgusting animal of an uncle who touched you in ways he wouldn't even with his own wife,'_ Elektra hissed into Alana's ear who shivered at the dominate personality's words.

The memories of her childhood slipped back into view, her bear of an uncle leaning over her six year old self, his paw like hands grabbing her small body-

"Alana, got hurt a lot, she did a lot of sports. She likes sports," Jasmine said softly while picking at her nails, her dark eyes flickered back to the older woman's face then back to her lap.

"I know, in her file it said that she was on the tennis team for a while," she quickly jotted down her in her journal making note of how Alana's stress level increased at the mention of her medical history. _'Jasmine might just be Alana's buffer for all of her trauma, yet Elektra seems to hold the brunt of the anger.'_

"She doesn't like hospital, nothing good comes from them," the girl sitting before the doctor flinched noticeably, her near black eyes turning to a surprising gold color.

"Oh, and who are you?" curiosity burned her tongue like a fire as she took in the lax yet confident posture of the young girl sitting in front of her. A smirk curled her lips when golden orbs finally settled onto her.

"I'm Chelsea, Elektra really doesn't like you, she thinks you're only going to hurt Alana," she said a saucy expression taking over her face.

"Do you agree with her?"

"I don't know, I haven't gotten to talk to you yet," her eyes didn't seem to focus on the blond woman, rather they differed to carved nude statue sitting high on a shelf. The hunger in her eyes matched the leer etching its way onto her features.

"Chelsea, is there something about the sculpture that you like?"

"Only that it has a penis, Alana doesn't like those, and Elektra thinks they should be cut off, that girl is quite the brute," she crossed her legs and kept her gaze at the statue, her gaze unwavering.

"Do you know why that is?" the other felt a tiny sense of hope brewing when she noticed how free this persona seemed to be with relaying information to her.

"Oh, doctor I think you already know the answer," she grinned and flinched, her eyes squeezing shut. Alana was back and she looked extremely tired a bit confused.

"I think that's all for today," Dr. Collins informed her writing the last of her observations into her thick journal. "You can go to study hall now Alana."

"Okay… bye," the green eyed girl got up from the leather chair wincing at the pain behind her eyes as she left the tiny room.

"She's a lot more damaged than I thought," the psychiatrist sighed loudly putting the file away as James walked into the room. "Hello James, how are you today?"

"Okay I guess, the stupid lunch ladies kept giving me extra food, it's like they want me to stay fat," he grumbled crossing his muscular arms over his chest.

Dr. Collins only took a deep breath; turning the page in her journal she began making notes on James and his obsession with being thin when he was already perfectly in shape. Her hope to help the damaged teens residing in the Palm Woods fluctuated from patient to patient, but she really did want to help them even if some of them like James and Alana acted as if her help made no difference at all.

Alana walked towards the table that Carlos was occupying nervously, she noticed Kendall sitting across from the raven haired boy who looked up and gave her a friendly smile causing Carlos to turn around and nearly blind her with his broad gleaming smile.

"Aly, come sit with Kendall and me, there's a seat right here," he excited said pulling out a chair next to him while the smile on the blond's face stayed firmly in place.

"Hi," she waved to the both of them shyly as Carlos leaned over and placed a quick kiss to her cheek making her whole body go hot.

'_I bet if you weren't surrounded by people, you'd pounce him and eat him up wouldn't you?"_ Chelsea taunted with a perverse smirk on her lips.

"How was therapy?" Kendall's green eyes looked at her with the same innocence and sadness she'd seen last night which only made her feel even more at ease.

"It was okay, I don't really remember it though," she shrugged feeling the constant throbbing behind her eyes receding. "How are you two doing?"

"I didn't say anything, her eyes creep me out," the depressed boy admitted looking to the bandage on his arm then back into Alana's eyes.

"She thinks I'm suicidal because I like fire, she's wrong," Carlos admitted his pencil stopping it's movements on the paper of his sketchbook.

Silence settled among the trio, it was gentle like cotton and a comfortable sense of companionship held them together. Despite their scarring pasts and damaged minds they knew they could find some semblance of comfort amongst themselves.

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><p><strong>Read and review please all comments and thoughts are welcome. An update will come soon. xoxo<strong>


	7. Chapter 7

_**AN:** Sorry for the long update, I actually have a lot of projects that I'm currently working on so I apologize. This chapter is a bit lighter compared to the ones to come after it, though something does happen with Logan. I'm also trying to incorporate more characters into this story while not making the entire thing about Carlos and Alana. Well, I'll let you all get to the story, hope you all enjoy._

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><p>"So Carlos, how are you feeling sweetheart? Are the doctors making you feel better? Sofia Garcia asked looking to her son who was currently bouncing in his seat with concern in her dark eyes.<p>

"I'm great mom, I drew you a picture," he replied, a wide grin stretching his lips. "I hope you like it."

He flipped open his sketch book open to the marked page and carefully removed the page from the book before handing it tenderly to his mother.

"It's beautiful Carlos," his mother breathed looking to the drawing with a warm smile on her face. "But are you sure that you're okay dear?"

"Yeah mom, I'm fine," he smile broadly at his mother while a muck of emotions battled to show themselves. "A new girl moved in last week."

"Really? Did you make friends with her?" Sofia always worried about her son; his obsession for fire seemed to be the only thing he actively focused on.

At the question the teen blushed and looked down to his fingers that clutched onto his sketchbook tightly. "Well, we're more than just friends; she's my girlfriend and her name's Alana."

His heart raced when he thought of the damaged girl was so consumed with. The young boy missed the wife eyed expression on his mother's face when he finally looked up to meet her now curious gaze.

"Honey, are you sure about that? I wouldn't want you to get hurt," her voice was gentle and full of concern as she took his hands into hers.

"Of course I am momma, she's tons nicer than all the other girls here," his smile never faltering and the radiating warmth that swirled in his heart began to spread to the blood rushing in his veins. "I- I think I'm in love with her."

A warm smile curled to Sofia's lips despite the fact that her son may be falling into something that could hurt him worse than the fire he was so obsessed with.

"If she makes you happy, then I'm happy," she sighed and leaned over the table to kiss his cheek. "Take care of yourself Carlos."

"I will, I love you mom," he replied hugging his mother tightly as she stood up. "Tell dad and Tony, I said hi."

"I love you too honey, I'll tell them and you be safe now," she hugged him a find time before one of the guards escorted her to the public exit.

"Bye mom," he called after her as the doors closed behind her, his eyes widened at the sight of a tall Italian man with piercing green eyes stepped into the room. A wave of cold washed over him when the man's eyes connected with his dark ones.

"Hi daddy," Alana's voice fluttered from behind sending the lost warmth back into Carlos' body. "Hi Carlos, I saw your mom, she's really pretty."

His full attention was on her as she stepped closer to him, tucking the ever present sketchbook under his arm, he took her hands into his own not really caring if Alana's father was glaring a hole into his head,

"I'll see you in group later, okay. I have to talk to my dad now," she smiled tenderly at him while squeezing his hands tightly.

"Okay, bye Aly," his hands reluctantly slipped from hers, the warmth of her still clinging to him and seeped quickly into his bones.

He turned away from her, taking the sketchbook back into his hands as he walked towards the exit that led back into the institution. Looking back he stared at the girl of his affections longingly, the warning his mother had given was far from his mind.

"Who was that boy?" George Ramazzotti asked trying to keep his voice conversational and calm, his shoulders were tense with the news he had.

"His name is Carlos… he's my boyfriend," she looked to the surface of the table she now sat at as if it were the most interesting thing in the world while ringing her hands tightly.

"Oh? Do you like him?" he never knew of her having any boyfriends before, the daughter he knew was too timid to speak to boys much less start a relationship.

Her tongue felt like lead in her mouth as her father stared at her intently, keeping her eyes on the table; she nodded her answer, her hands still clenched in her lap.

'_Speak up dear, daddy can't hear you,'_ Elektra cooed softly into Alana's ear making her shiver noticeably.

"Are you cold?" she shook her head still neglecting to speak, but she finally lifted her eyes to meet her father's.

'_This is daddy Alana, you don't have to be afraid,'_ Chelsea whispered sitting on the left side of her.

'_For once the whore is right,'_ Elektra grumbled while giving Alana a rough poke in the side. _'Talk to him.'_

"So why are you here daddy?" she asked finally feeling her tongue work properly in her mouth.

"Well, I came to check on you, to make sure that you were getting better," he sighed running a hand through his dark thick hair peppered by strands of gray. "They found Michael's body, he's dead."

'_Wonder how long it took for them to find that disgusting excuse of a man,'_ Elektra snarled as she squeezed Alana's shoulder. _'He thinks you killed him.'_

"Why are you telling me?" her head hurt with the familiar ache pulsing behind her eyes as the information sunk in.

"After Michael had gone missing… I found pictures of you in his room," he father paused taking a long ragged breath before continuing. "Did he hurt you?" Was that the reason you hated him so much?"

Her throat tightened with a sudden dryness taking over as images of her vile half-brother flooded her mind. She flinched noticeably, her eyes bleeding blue before panic could consume her.

"So let's cut to the chase," Elektra snarled, her shoulder relaxing slightly, but held far more strength in them than Alana. "You think that Alana had something to do with that animal's death, don't you?  
>George's jaw tightened, he remembered seeing those cold blue eyes, he never thought he'd have to see them again, "I'm just tying up loose ends." He locked his fingers together on top of the table not sure how to continue.<p>

"Figures, you'd try to get justice for that creep than worry about your daughters well being," the fierce blue eyes bled black, her strong posture changed to a stiff meeker one. "Alana called for you every time he tried to cover her mouth, but you were never there- you didn't save her."

George sat there stunned, this was the second time he'd seen her personality shift and he knew as he watched his daughter's eyes go back to the emerald green he'd always known that she was far for broken than he'd realized.

"I'm sorry princess," he whispered making a move to grab her hand.

"It's not like you knew… or could do anything, bye daddy," she got up from the plastic chair of the visiting room feeling the ever present throbbing behind her increase. "I have to go now."

Turning away from her father, she missed his expression crumbling into a mixture of regret and sadness as she pushed open the door to make her way down the long hallway, finally by herself a sense of relief washed over her.

'_Well, at least now you don't have to worry about __**him**__ anymore,'_ Elektra sighed draping her arm over Alana's shoulder. _'Now you can focus on your darling Carlos.'_

"Shut up!" she hissed clutching her head when a sharp pain squeeze a nerve behind her eyes. When the pain dulled, she looked up to see that she was alone in the hallway.

Alana sat in her usual seat in group therapy next to Carlos, her fingers automatically twisting with his. A smile drew itself onto her face as her boyfriend's warmth washed over her like a gentle ocean breeze. She scooted her seat closer to him as they focused on each other ignoring the curious glances of the other patients filling to the room.

"Alright, well I know some of you had visitors today, who would like to talk about their visitor?" Kelly asked her smile wide as she warmly looked at the teenagers seated in the room.

"My dad came to visit me," Jo, a pretty brown eyed blonde said bravely, Alana had been informed by Carlos and Kendall that she was a bulimic who had nightmares the same _(almost)_ as Logan. "He wants to bring me brownies…"

'_That's sweet, her daddy bakes, it's just too bad that those lovely brownies will end up in the toilet after she eats them,'_ Elektra whispered rolling her eyes making Alana flinch inwardly at her appearance.

"Is he going to bring you some?" Kelly inquired sweetly while heather stood to the side silently probing the bulimic with her eyes.

Feeling a sense of shame, Jo looked to her lap while shaking her head quickly. Her shoulders tensed noticeably as the brunette girl next to her rubbed her back consolingly. Alana could see that the two of them obviously shared a war against the same demons.

'_Birds of a feather, obviously,'_ Elektra rolled her eyes at the two girls. '_Just like those three skinny girls that always stick together.'_

Unintentionally her green eyes looked to the Jennifers who huddled together giving anyone who looked their way fierce glares.

'_Personally, I'd like to break their little necks,'_ Elektra hissed giving the anorexics her own glare.

Shivering slightly Alana closer into the boy next to her while still trying to ignore the pounding headache that never seemed to go away.

"Logan, you seem fidgety today, it there something you'd like to say?" Heather stared down the face skinned boy who immediately looked to his sneaked in what the over zealous counselor took as shyness.

"I- I don't- I d- I don't think my medications work anymore," he muttered he felt his heart rate quicken with the feel of everyone's eyes focused heavily on him.

"And why do you think that? Are you taking them?" Kelly gave the other woman a warning glance that went ignored as she bulleted the panicking teen with questions.

"Th-They don't K-Keep _him_ away," he rocked himself in the plastic chair, his knuckles turning white as he squeezed onto the chair.

"Logie… are you okay?" Kendall softly asked setting his hand gently in hope to snap his friend back to reality, instead the shorter flinched from under the blonde's hand.

Sweat beaded along his brow, his breathing became shallow as the images of his nightmares replayed even more vividly in front of his brown eyes. His body shook, his skin pricking at the feel of those claws digging into his flesh.

"Go away! Stop touching me! No! Leave me alone!" he screamed throwing himself to the floor; he clawed at his scalp and body frantically.

The other teens watched in terrified fascination some of them had witnessed Logan's panic attacks before, but they'd never seen him thrashing around in mental agony on this scale. And they all could see that he was fighting a losing battle against his own demon.

With wide eyes Kelly called for the orderlies who rushed into the room, lifted the still thrashing boy and carted him off to the infirmary to be sedated.

"Um, does anyone else have something they'd like to share," Kelly awkward questioned as a thick blanket of tension fell over the patients, all were a little shake by Logan's episode.

"Jesus Christ, this is why no one ever wants to talk, stupid Heather's always badgering people," James loudly said glaring at the woman as he crossed his arms over his chest, all in the room nodded and muttered their agreement while the woman only shrugged.

'_I'm proud of you, sitting with your boyfriend instead of all by yourself,'_ Elektra smiled as Alana sat next to Carlos at the boys' usual table in the cafeteria for dinner.

"Logan, are you feeling better?" she asked noticing that the raven haired boy was staring blankly at his tray of food.

"Oh, I'm fine, thank you" he mumbled glancing at her before picking up the plastic utensils they were all given.

"You're welcome," she replied looking down at her own food, James sat down on the other side of her; he sighed staring hatefully at the food.

"Why do they expect me to eat all this?" the lean boy grumbled as he meticulously separated his food by color and size.

'_He's either OCD or he's anorexic,'_ Alana mused to herself as she watched James cut his steak in half then quarters, and then eighths. "James… what are you doing?"

"Making sure I don't eat too much of this, they're trying to make me fat," he whispered to her, his hazel eyes darting to the nurses that watched him, and the Jennifers to make sure they didn't try to throw away their food.

"Oh," she awkwardly shifted in her seat; she didn't exactly know if she should tell him that he was silly to think he'd ever be over weight, rather she went back to eating her chicken.

"Hey, um… Alana, I was thinking that maybe you could come to music with me and James," Kendall swallowed the food in his mouth as he looked to the girl sitting across from him, his green eyes staring intently into hers.

"Sure, I'd love to, that way I don't have to go to gym after therapy," she smiled at the blonde who smiled back at her.

'_Aww, this is so cute, you're making friends now,'_ Elektra patted her on the head as she ate her dinner and made more conversation with the boys around her.

The news her father had given her was far away from her, that is until she went to bed that night.

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><p><strong>So leave a review with you comments, concerns, and critiques. An update will come soon. xoxo<strong>


	8. Chapter 8

**_AN_:**_ I know that this update is long over due and I'm sorry it took me so long to get back on the horse and write this chapter. Anyway, I've decided upon introducing Mercedes who has Borderline Personality Disorder and is a Compulsive Liar, she and Alana will become casual friends. Also I'm trying to write each of the other characters stories as best as I can so you all can understand how they all fit together. Like I've said before, I'm trying to write Alana bonding with each other the boys in some kind of way since I don't want to focus too much on her relationship with Carlos. Anyway, I hope you all enjoy this chapter, and hopefully I'll be able to update this story sooner._

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><p>'<em>I'll never leave you Logan,'<em> the familiar raspy voice echoed into his head making the brown eyed boy shiver violently.

"Logan, do you hear his voice?" Dr. Collins took his hands gently in hers before the panicky teen had a panic attack. "Deep breaths, Logan."

Heading the doctor's advice, the brown eyed boy inhaled deeply then exhaled. Repeating the process he managed to shake the nightmare's claws from his mind.

"Thanks, I-I feel better now," he smiled gratefully to the therapist, unlike the other patients Logan liked to talk to Dr. Collins.

_Sometimes_

"You're welcome, now that's all the time we have, you can go to study hall," she replied giving the teen another warm smile before slipping her hands from his and picking up her leather journal. "We'll pick up tomorrow."

"Alright, well um… about my sleeping pills," the nervous boy trailed off unsure of how the woman would respond.

"You'll be getting new medication after dinner today," she assured him, he nodded in response as he lifted himself from the thick leather chair.

"Okay," he sighed, a small wave of relief washing over him as he made his exit.

Taking another deep breath he made his way to the room he shared with Kendall and quickly picked up a book before he made his way to the library. The shy boy would always find comfort in novels since the monsters in those stories always died.

_Unlike the one living inside his head._

'_Deep breaths Logan, deep breaths,'_ he reprimanded himself to stop the wave of panic which usually crashed down on him.

Pushing open the door to the library, he made his way to the table where he always sat with Kendall and Carlos, (_James was in an extra food therapy session because he was caught dumping his food)_ today he noticed that Alana was there writing in the dark blue journal as she sat relatively close to Carlos who was as usual busily drawing in his sketchbook with a piece of charcoal. And Kendall much to the skittish boy's surprise had a book instead of meticulously picking at the scabs and scars on his body.

"Hey guys," he greeted taking a seat next to his sullen roommate who gave him a slight smile.

"Hey," the other dark haired boy muttered, his dark eyes entirely fixated on whatever artwork he was creating.

"Hi… did you sleep okay?" Alana blinked at him nervous when hi eyes met hers; he was surprised by the question since no one ever bothered to ask him before.

"Um, kind of… I didn't see anything, ugh thanks," he replied awkwardly as he opened his book to his bookmark and she went back to writing in her journal.

'_That's a good girl, caring about Carlos' friends will make him like you more,'_ Elektra whispered making Alana flinch which Logan took notice of.

"Are you okay?" his brown eyes examined her closely as she fidgeted under his gaze.

"Yeah, I'm fine," she lied with an awkward smile before looking back down at her journal.

Narrowing his eyes he neglected to push further since he didn't if he'd trigger a personality by continuing his line of questioning. But he wanted to let the words fall from his mouth so bad, he was curious about her and why she was here.

He also wanted to make sure that her intentions with Carlos were pure. So far they appeared to be, but Logan knew from experience that looks were deceiving.

"You guys, I heard that Heather got fired," James whispered as Alana sat in her usual seat for group therapy.

"How do you know that?" Kendall blinked in surprise while the others looked to the brunette with eyes full of curiosity and interest.

"Well, before I went in for _therapy_, I heard the doc telling her that the way she handled patients couldn't be tolerated," James took a moment to pause; he noticed all the eyes on him and felt a knot twist in his gut. _'They're all staring at my __**fat**__.'_

"And then what?" Logan urged jarring the thin obsessed boy from whatever thoughts he was having.

"Oh, right… well doc told her that she couldn't work here anymore, even if she was her daughter," he finished, satisfied by the wide eyed looked he received from divulging the information he'd obtained.

"Well, I guess that's a good thing," Kendall muttered, the other boys nodded in agreement, the blond noticed Alana staring rather blankly at her feet, but said nothing of it as he looked to James who was pestering him about his hair. "No, James I'm not going to put highlights into my hair."

'_Good, that creepy chick is gone, I never wanted to gut someone more,'_ Elektra commented with an approving nod of her head.

"Her eyes were really creepy, I'm glad Heather's gone. Kelly's a lot nicer," Carlos admitted as the final patient filled into the room.

When Kelly stepped forward Alana noticed just as the boys had, that there weren't as many people in the room as their usually were.

"Hello everyone, before we get started we have a new resident with us," she smiled as she waved in a pretty blond who stepped into the room full of confidence. "This is Mercedes; you can sit anywhere you like."

The girl nodded taking a seat in front of Alana and gave the other a small smile as she sat down.

"How come there aren't as many people here?" Dak asked, surprising everyone with the sound of his voice. Normally, the blue eyed boy would only speak if Jet told him too, and the arrogant boy was no where in sight.

Kelly blinked at the brunette before quickly collecting herself to answer, "Well, since heather isn't with us any longer, there will be 4 group sessions instead of 2, that way you're all more comfortable with sharing."

The other teens in the room muttered amongst themselves, as Kelly looked through a clipboard with the names of the patients that were moved around to different group slots.

"So, why are you here Mercedes?" James asked the girl who turned around to study his face before giving her answer.

"I don't know, some doctor my dad sent me to thinks I'm crazy," She shrugged and tossed her blond wavy hair over her shoulder. "I'm perfectly fine."

"You're lying," Alana muttered softly, her eyes fixed on the new girl whose eyes became full of shock. "You do that a lot don't you…lying?"

What?" she gulped, her eyes filling with panic and her face contorting into an unreadable expression.

"Have you ever stolen anything before?" the normally quite girl studied the now squirming girl with an intense look in her eyes.

The boys watched the two girls closely, completely enraptured by the sudden tension between them.

'_I'm impressed Aly, you're getting better at sniffing out Pretty Little Liars,'_ Elektra smirked as she petted Alana's hair gently.

Mercedes stilled, her eyes becoming calm all traces of panic were gone after she gulped down a tiny breath of air.

"No… I wouldn't steal anything," her fingers gripped the back of the chair as Alana eyed her skeptically.

"You're lying. You can't ever tell the truth can you?" the nerve between Alana's eyes throbbed causing her eyes to flash black, then back to green.

Mercedes chewed her lip in response to the question; she never had someone call her out on any of her lies so boldly.

"H-how could you tell about her, Aly?" Kendall whispered from the other side of her, his green eyes wide and curious.

"My sister has the same problem," she shrugged leaning into Carlos subconsciously.

He didn't get the chance to ask to ask her about her sister and what she meant, as Kelly's voice directed their attention back to the front of the room.

"So Mercedes, since you're new you don't have to say anything unless you feel that you want to," the counselor said sweetly before addressing the other patients. "Now, is there anyone who'd like to start off?"

"It feels weird with out Jett here," Dark blurted out then quickly averted his eyes to his shoes, his cheeks flushing pink.

His attempt at being bold with out his dominant roommate in the room shriveled like a leaf when the others in the room stared at him intently.

"And why do you feel that way?" Kelly probed gently, she very glad that the normally silent boy was speaking.

"Because, h-he makes… um I-I just like it when he's around," he stumbled over the word and kept his eyes on his shoes.

'_Those two must have a lot of __**fun **__together,'_ Chelsea leered and giggled perversely making Alana shiver inwardly at her appearance.

"So, are you in love with him or something?" even though Alana couldn't, see her she knew that the new girl had arched one of her perfect brows at the shy nymphomaniac in curiosity.

"No! I just don't like being alone," he admitted while wringing his hands together.

Kelly gave the teenage boy a sympathetic look which he gave a smile in response.

"I'm glad we have less people," James stated boldly while crossing his arms over his chest, hazel eyes bright with defiance. _'Less people to stare at my gross fat.'_

"Really, and why is that?" the older woman held his gaze, her dark eyes daring him to speak.

The other teens in the room sat in the stagnant silence; Alana squinted wondering what thoughts were running through the tall boy's head.

'_He thinks he's fat remember. He's probably glad that they're less people to look at him,'_ Elektra whispered while twirling a strand of her hair.

"It sounds like you're not much of a people person," Mercedes sighed turning her body slightly to look at the boy who was now glaring holes into her head.

With a roll of her eyes, she gave Alana a sly wink before turning back around.

'_Looks like someone may have a new friend,'_ Elektra smirked as Jo struggled to confess about the brownies and other food items her parents had sent to her.

"I don't want anymore friends," she muttered to herself causing Carlos to look at her inquisitively.

"You say something Aly?" his coffee colored eyes looking to her filled with unbridled affection and innocence.

"No," she shook her head managing a fake smile as he pecked her on the cheek lightly.

His hand slipped from hers briefly to push some of her hair behind her ear and smiled brightly at her. The sight sent the damaged girl's heart racing like a jack rabbit that smile of his would always have her wishing and hope that she could keep the excitable pyromaniac as hers forever.

'_Good things don't ever last long,'_ Jasmine said had once, before Michael had disappeared.

"Well, that's all the time we have for group today, you all can go to your scheduled activities," Kelly said, her pleasant voice breaking Alana from her reverie.

"So, your name's Aly, like Alyson?" Mercedes questioned as they all made their way out of the room, her eyes fixated on Alana's.

"It's Alana, but you can call me Aly," she replied her stomach clenching from the sudden interest.

"Cool, guess I'll see you later," the other smiled brightly before turning around and sauntered down the other end of the hall.

"She's weird," Carlos commented abruptly while clutching his sketchbook to his chest.

"We're all weird, some more than others," Kendall shrugged, his eyes on the scuffed linoleum floor, while the odd group of friends nodded their heads in agreement.

Kendall held the guitar easily in his hands and smiled comfortably at Alana as he tuned the instrument.

"I really like music, I just wish they'd let me keep my guitar in my room," he frowned slightly before smiling at the girl sitting next to him again.

"That's too bad," she replied looking to the piano that James was sitting at completely lost in whatever song he was playing. "Do you want me to sing while you play?"

The golden-haired boy grinned; nodding his head he started a song that was very familiar to Alana. Exhaling deeply she let the words fall from her lips easily, not noticing that the other patients in the room had stopped what they were doing to listen.

_Oh star fall down on me  
>Let me make a wish upon you<br>Hold on, let me think  
>Think of what I'm wishing for<em>

_Wait, don't go away._  
><em>Just not yet.<em>  
><em>Cause I thought,<em>  
><em>I had it.<em>  
><em>But I forget.<em>

_And I won't let you fall away,_  
><em>From me.<em>  
><em>You will never fade.<em>  
><em>And I won't let you fall away.<em>  
><em>From me.<em>  
><em>You will never fade away from me.<em>

_And now I let my dreams consume me,_  
><em>And tell me what to think.<em>  
><em>But hold on,<em>  
><em>Hold on.<em>  
><em>What am I dreaming?<em>

_Wait, don't go away._  
><em>Just not yet.<em>  
><em>Cause I thought,<em>  
><em>That I had it.<em>  
><em>But I forget.<em>

_And I won't let you fall away,_  
><em>From me.<em>  
><em>You will never fade away.<em>  
><em>I won't let you fall away.<em>  
><em>You will never fade away.<em>

_And I won't let you fall away._  
><em>You will never fade away.<em>  
><em>And I won't let you fall away from me,<em>  
><em>You will never...<em>

_Oh star fall down on me._

"Wow, I didn't know you could sing like that," the normally sullen boy gushed as everyone else erupted in applause. "See, everyone else thinks so too, right James?"

"Yeah… your voice is pretty Aly," the aforementioned boy agreed, his eyes told the girl that there were other things he wanted to say, but he'd much rather keep them to himself.

"Thanks, I don't really sing often," she bit her lip and looked to her lap, her face flushing with heat.

"You should sing more often," a voice behind the pair said suddenly causing Alana to jump in surprise. "Your voice is nice."

"Oh, um, thank you," she blinked at a dark haired boy who seemed to be very attached to the guitar he was carrying.

The boy nodded and walked off to a corner in the room where he sat down playing an unfamiliar tune on his beloved instrument.

"That's guitar dude, he doesn't talk much. He's schizophrenic," Kendall informed her once she turned back around to face him, whispering the last part.

"Oh okay, well, do you want me to sing another song?" she smiled gently at the depressive boy who smiled at her eagerly.

The two of them started on another song, and afterwards Alana attempted to teach Kendall how to write his own lyrics, after telling her about the ideas that he had for songs.

"I'm glad you cam to music Aly, this is much more fun," he said as he watched her write down lyrics.

"Yeah, this is fun," she smiled noticing that her constant headache was gone _for now._

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><p><strong><em>Please leave all your thoughts, comments, concerns and critiques in the form of a review. Bucket List will be update very soon! xoxo<em>**


	9. Chapter 9

**AN:** _Sorry that this chapter wasn't updated any sooner. I've had tons of other projects that I'm working on, but I will try to get Bucket List updated as soon as I possibly can. Also, I know that some people are very annoyed when people write Kendall being called Kenny in fan fiction, well I don't understand why. But in this chapter Elektra calls him Kenny mostly in a condescending manner since that's how that particular personality of Alana's is. I also wanted Kendall to have a crush on Alana because I can. Anyway, enjoy the chapter updates to come soon!_

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><p>Alana winced at the bright lights in the hall as she stepped out of her room, feeling very much like a young owl seeing sunlight for the very first time. Putting her hands over her eyes she took a few deep breaths till the throbbing behind her eyes eased before shutting the door to her room and continue her journey down the hall.<p>

"Where should I go?" she whispered into the silence around her as she walked aimlessly along the corridor.

'_You could always try to escape, I could help you get out,'_ Elektra offered poking her in the shoulder with a smirk on her face. _'But I bet you couldn't leave little Carlos, now could you?'_

"Shut up!" she hissed feeling her head begin to ache again.

Her hands clutched her head as the pounding in her head continued mercilessly; the pain nearly bringing her to her knees. A soft whine escaped her lips as she gripped her head tighter, her green eyes squeezing shut as they were about to bleed into blue.

'_You need to leave.'_

'_She can't leave him.'_

'_There's no place to go.'_

'_Just slip out in the night, I'll show you.'_

'_And then what, she'll be lost till they find her.'_

Black. White. Black. White.

The dark green carpet was rough under her fingers as the clobbering in her head finally subsided, it was moments like this that she wished that there weren't so many things rampaging inside her head. Slowly she moved herself up from the floor back onto her feet and to her surprise, her legs weren't shaking the way the usually did.

"Just need to move Aly, you just need to move," she swallowed leaning heavily against the wall before taking a careful step forward.

Seeing that she was safe, physically and mentally Alana walked further down the hall turning around corners still unsure of where she was going. She just kept walking not wanting to have another episode of whatever that was, happen in her head again. A heavy sigh left her lips as she reached the end of the hall she was walking and before she could push the door that was begging her to open it, a soft hiss caught her attention.

Turning away from the door, she saw a supply closet with the door that was open just slightly. Stepping closer, she heard a clinking sound and lips smacking together, furrowing her brow she leaned forward and saw Kendall lapping at the bleeding skin of his left arm. In his other hand looked to her like a broken piece of a knife.

'_Help him,'_ Elektra ordered shoving her shoulder making the girl jerk forward and smack her hand against the door.

"Who's there?" the blond hissed, his green eyes darkening while his grip tightened on the metal in his hand.

"It's me… Aly," she gulped, opening the door more, she stepped into the closet and quickly shut it behind her not exactly wanting the either of them to get caught together. Especially not with Kendall bleeding all over himself.

'_Wouldn't want Carlos to think you were cheating, now would you?' _Elektra commented with a smirk as the panicky girl leaned against the door of the surprisingly large closet.

"Oh… hi Aly, please don't tell. Please," he pleaded standing up with the blade digging into his palm.

"Just… put that down," she mumbled, her eyes fixed on the sharp object. She sighed in relief when he set it on a near by shelf and covered the exposed wounds on his bleeding arm. "You really shouldn't hurt yourself Kendall."

"I-I know, but I like it," he toed the floor of the small room, his eyes looking to the floor before he looked into her eyes feeling a small sense of shame washing over him.

"But why? Pain, doesn't feel good," she whispered and took hold of his hand that was now stained with his blood. "I have full experience with that."

"Well, I think it feels good," he licks his lips and swallows, watching her expression switch into a more fierce one.

He gasped when her green eyes shifted into an icy blue and a tiny wave of fear washed over him at the sight.

"Aly?" he started to move his hand away from her, uncertain of what the girl might do, but when he did she simply grabbed the injured arm sharply which made him hiss loudly in pain.

"Quiet, Kenny," she ordered, her voice quiet and commanding making his entire body flush with heat. "Wouldn't want anyone to hear us, now do you?"

The blond shook his head no in response, a blush dusting his cheeks as he stared into the now cold eyes of the short girl. He felt entirely exposed and uncertain as her fingers, somehow feeling different trailed along the still bleeding cuts.

"Aly and I know a lot about pain Kenny," Elektra started eyes fixated by the crimson ink coming out of his arm. "But she's right; it doesn't feel good… unless you're the one giving it to someone else."

"Oh, but… I-I… um you're not Aly?" he flushed his free arm grabbing at his pants, while his eyes went to his scuffed vans.

"No, I'm Elektra," she smirked while he blushed more as she let his arm go. "And you need to clean that before it gets infected."

He nodded dumbly as she found a few medical supplies in the closet and made quick work of cleaning his hands and the cuts he inflicted upon himself.

"You're really nice," he blurted and bit his lip after she finished wrapping the gauze tape onto his arm and pulled down the sleeve of his shirt for him.

"It's only because you're blond," Elektra replied with another smirk before giving him a kiss on the cheek. "And Aly's your _friend_, right Kenny?"

"Right… friends," he mumbled secretly hating the fact that Alana (and Elektra too) had no interest in him.

"Don't be sad Kenny, you're the second boy Aly, isn't scared of," she tapped the tip of his nose causing him to smile despite himself. "You're so cute."

"Thanks," he gushed and watched as her eyes went back to that familiar emerald green and she winced, leaning into him just a tad.

"What? Why are you saying thank you?" she looked at him confused and slipped her hand away from his, a frown drew itself to his face.

"Because, you fixed my arm," he bit his lip pulling up the sleeve on his shirt to show his now bandaged arm.

"Oh… well you're welcome, and you shouldn't hurt yourself," her eyes were uncertain as she gently pulled down the sleeve covering up the gauze on his arm. "No matter how good, you think it makes you feel."

"Okay… I'll try, thanks Aly," he smiled softly making her smile as he pulled her into a surprising gentle hug.

"It's okay, and um… I think we should get out of this closet," she mumbled feeling a little flustered from Kendall's bold display of affection.

He nodded in agreement as she turned around and quietly opened the door then signaled to him that the hall was still quiet and empty. Slipping out of the tiny room, the two teens exited out the door that led them outside into the Palm Woods Grounds.

"I didn't know this was here," the flaxen haired boy breathed as he looked at the green garden they were now standing in.

"Carlos said it's always been here," Alana, replied simply and started walking into the lush garden. "We walked through it together a couple of times."

"Oh."

The slender boy felt a flush of envy rush into his stomach at the mention of the pyromaniac; he knew that he shouldn't be jealous. But he couldn't exactly stop the ugly emotion from bubbling at the pit of his gut. Yet, before he could say anything, a faint smell of smoke and ash filled their noses.

"Do you smell that?" Alana stopped suddenly and looked up above the tall bushes to see a faint line of smoke traveling upward. "Carlos…"

'_He probably managed to burn something…he's going to burn himself,' _Elektra hissed pushing Alana roughly. '_Go find him, now!'_

She rushed forward through the small maze, Kendall with out question following her as they got closer to the smell of something being burned. And just as the timid girl suspected, Carlos was standing in front of a fire burning brightly in one of the green metal trash cans that he obviously had moved to where he was standing. For a moment they watched him, his eyes normally full of childish happiness, were wide with lust and desire.

His hands twisting together as if he could hardly contain himself.

It was a strange sight for either of the pair, since Carlos looked normal compared to the both of them and the rest of the patients in the building not to far from where they were standing.

No doubt, some of the staff could be lurking the grounds to make sure that none of them would escape, or like Carlos set anything ablaze.

"Carlos, what are you doing?" Alana started gently immediately getting his attention.

His expression changed into one full of shock and shame as he rambled and quickly as he could covered up the fire with top of the trash can.

"I was… I was," his face flushed with embarrassment as his friends looked at him critically. "You can't tell anyone."

"You've done this before, haven't you Carlos?" Kendall asked as the shorter boy fidgeted uncomfortably in front of them.

"Well… I-I… I just…" he stumbled over his words as Alana moved closer to him and took the lighter from his hands easily and lifted his chin to make him look her in the eye. "I wanted to see you, Aly."

"You're seeing me now," she tilted her head to the side, not entirely understanding what he meant.

'_He thinks you're fire… that you are the human personification of his obsession,'_ Jasmine whispered and squeezed onto Alana's upper arm.

"No… I, it's different…" Carlos muttered squeezing onto her hand that was now holding his stolen lighter.

"We'll talk about this later, first we have to get rid of this," she firmly said as she moved herself from the normally energetic boy's grasp while Jasmine's words still rung loudly in her ears.

"But-

"Carlos, you could get caught… remember the last time you managed to burn something," Kendall interjected keeping his distance from the two, his green eyes looking blankly at the Latino.

Sighing heavily, the shorter male relinquished the lighter, allowing Alana to disappear into the green labyrinth and then appearing a few seconds later. She paused before reaching the two boys and winced noticeably, her eyes flickering from gold, blue and then back to green.

"Are you okay Aly?" both boys asked at the same time, their voices laced heavily with concern.

"Yeah, I'm fine," she smiled through the pounding headache that suddenly came back. "Besides, we've got to go back inside. It's almost time for group."

The boys nodded, their expressions becoming grim as the petite girl led them back through the garden. And just as her hand touched the knob, she turned to them with a serious look on her face.

"Whatever happened today… didn't happen. Okay?" she bit her lip as they nodded fully understanding the implication of the statement. "Good, now let's go to group."

'_Keeping even more secrets, I'm so proud of you Aly,'_ Elektra whispered as the door shut behind Kendall who was the last to walk through the door.

'_Shut up!'_ Alana hissed mentally to the blue eyed entity, subconsciously glaring at the open space next to her.

"Aly, what are you looking at?" Carlos asked as his hand slipped into hers easily, averting her attention back to him.

"Nothing… it's nothing Carlos," she smiled stepping closer to him as the three of them walked down the corridors that lead back to the main hall.

"Are you sure?" he squeezed her hand tightly, his chocolate brown eyes looking at her worriedly. She noted that his hands felt a bit rougher than before, she had a feeling that maybe he'd burned himself before she and Kendall had seen him.

"Positive," she nodded and gave him a soft kiss on his jaw that made him gasp in surprise, his body flushing with heat. "Your hand is burnt."

"Only a little," he blushed embarrassed, his other hand rubbing the back of his neck.

The two of them were entirely unaware of the now brooding blond shooting daggers into Carlos' back. He didn't say a word as they got consumed with each other, the raven haired boy's hand slipped from his girlfriend's to around her waist, pulling her even closer into his side.

Shaking his head Kendall mentally berated himself for being jealous of the pyro who was finally getting a girl to show him attention, and with out the fear of being burned alive by him.

'_Poor Sandy,'_ he thought remembering the girl who viciously yelled at Carlos for calling her by her sister's name.

The boy somehow managed to burn half her face and then happily told her that now he wouldn't get her name wrong anymore. Of course Carlos got put into isolation for a month immediately after the incident, but Sandy well obviously she was never the same after that, and every girl in the institution would avoid him simply on principle.

But now, here was Alana smiling and giggling with him as if the two of them weren't in a nut house. Kendall couldn't understand her (nor their relationship) at all, but that's what he liked about her. Even if he couldn't have her, and as the three of them filed into the room, taking their usual seats; the broody boy wished that green eyed broken girl was holding his hand and smiling at him instead.

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><p><em><strong>Hope you all enjoyed the chapter, please leave me your thoughts, concerns and questions in the form of a review. Thank you! Updates to this story and others are coming soon! xoxo<strong>_


	10. Chapter 10

_**AN**: Sorry for getting this chapter updated any sooner. I just didn't have the motivation to get it done. I hope you all can understand the way this story is going. If not, I'll explain with the next update that will hopefully come sooner than this one did. Anyway, another character has been introduced, and you'll all get to meet her in the next chapter. This chapter focuses a bit more on the way that all the characters in this story interact with each other. I hope you all enjoy this chapter._

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><p>Kendall squeezed his hands together as he watched Alana sitting near to him in music therapy. He'd spent the last 15 minutes trying to think of something that would make the wide eyed girl consider being more than just his friend, but every idea coming into his head seemed impossibly stupid.<p>

'_Just give up Knight, she may be a princess, but she's not yours_,' the broody blond thought mournfully to himself as he looked back to the guitar in his lap.

"Hey Kendall," a familiar male voice called him from his thoughts, the boy sat next to him and gave him a critical look with his vibrant hazel eyes.

"Oh, hi James," he sighed aimlessly strumming the strings of his guitar. "What do you want?"

"I just saw you over here brooding… again, and you've kept staring at _her_ for the past 15 minutes," the brunette replied with a concerned look taking over his angular face, the other noticed how he was gaining more weight and the color was starting to come back to his cheeks.

But Kendall knew that he couldn't say anything about that.

"No I haven't," he denied readily his pale cheeks flushing pink contradicting his words. "Besides, why do you care?"

"I don't… I mean she's beautiful, but don't you think that you shouldn't be trying to get her from Carlos?" the taller of the two bit his lip and moved his chair away slightly, knowing that the blond was prone to violent rages at the slightest provocation.

"I'm not… at least not now," he admitted his left hand curling around the neck of the guitar tightly. "I just… wish she were mine."

"Why? I mean, I get it she's sweet and all, but that's all we know about her. The stuff on the surface, that she's told us since she's been here," James said as he and Kendall looked to the girl quietly writing and alternating to hitting a few keys on the keyboard she was sitting Indian style behind.

"So it's okay for Carlos to like her, but not me. Is that what you're saying?" the agitation was subtle but clearly heard in his voice as he narrowed his jade green eyes at the boy sitting next to him. "Is _that_ what you're saying James?"

James backed his chair away even more from the broody boy worried that he might have set him off; he had been told by Logan earlier than he hadn't taken his medication in the past week, the nurses didn't know that and he was worrying if he should help the blond keep it that way. Kendall was dangerous especially when he really wanted to be.

"No, I-I'm just saying that you should let Carlos decide if he wants to end things with her or not," he said slowly as he watched the blond relax and look back to his guitar. "I'm just looking out for the both of you man."

"Oh…yeah I guess I should just try to swallow these feelings down then huh?" the guitar wielding boy sighed in acquiescence feeling his entire body sag when James smiled sadly at him. "This sucks."

"Lots of things suck, like getting extra food stuck on your plate when you're already weigh the same as an obese walrus," the brunette said whispering the last part to the blond.

"Ugh, I don't think walrus' can get obese James, never mind I don't want to talk about food with you," the depressive boy said with a disproving look knowing that the conversation would go to an uncomfortable place.

"Why not? No one else will," the hazel eyed boy whined immaturely causing the boy next to him to stifle a laugh.

"Can't you talk to the Jennifers about how much you hate food?" he shook his shaggy hair from his eyes as he stood up from his chair to place his guitar into its case as Gustavo their counselor announced the end of therapy.

"No, they just stare at me… and I don't like being stared at, _at least not anymore_," he mumbled the last part suddenly looking to his hands in his lap.

The broody boy simply frowned in response, he could relate on some level to boy currently staring at his hands as if they held all the secrets of the world. When bright hazel eyes looked up at him, for a moment Kendall felt sorrier for James than himself because in those eyes he saw all the pain, and anguish that the obsessive boy tried so hard. Yet, as quickly as he'd seen that pain it was gone as he smiled brightly and stood up from his chair clapping the paler boy on the shoulder as the boy easily made their way out of the music room.

"Man, I love the food here," Carlos chimed happily as he sat down at the group's usual table for dinner a wide grin on his face. "I just wish I could get to work in the kitchen."

"Well, why can't you?" Mercedes questioned not understanding what harm the bouncy Latino could possibly do as she sat next to Alana who was staring blankly at the table.

"He'd burn something… on purpose," Logan started his gaze moving to his food tray when her eyes looked into his.

"Oh, so you like fire?" the blond girl ventured as a feeling of uneasiness settled into her lower abdomen.

"Yeah, everyone but Aly thinks I'm weird for liking fire so much," he pouted dragging his fork through his mashed potatoes his voice somehow still cheerful while a frown barely rested on his lips. "You probably think so too."

"It shouldn't matter what I think," she replied easily with a shrug of her shoulders. "Besides, aren't we all weird?"

Carlos grinned at her brightly as he looked back to his food and stuffed large forkfuls of mashed potatoes into his mouth. Taking a moment he took a large gulp of his juice then he turned to Alana smiled sweetly at her and leaned towards her to whisper something in her ear, the two suddenly becoming very oblivious to the world around them.

'_Stop leaning so close to her_,' Kendall clenched his jaw as he averted his eyes from the pair to glare at the large slice of pizza on his tray.

He looked up when he James nudged him from his left side and he sighed then shook his head and started eating while James did his usual routine of separating his food by color, then by texture and size before he'd then take his plastic knife to cut his chicken in half, the quarters and finally eighths.

Mercedes watched with interest as the obsessive boy wiped the sauce from his chicken onto a napkin before putting a small piece of it into his mouth, curiosity burned the tip of her tongue like lava while he chewed the small morsel with absolute misery marring his expression. But thinking better of saying anything she looked to her own food, sticking her fork into the strawberries she'd asked for.

'_She's staring at me because I'm fat… I'm so gross that she probably can't even eat…I hate her. Stupid Mercedes, why is she even here?_' James mentally snarled as he glanced up from his food to give the girl a slight glare that went unnoticed. _'It's bad enough that Aly watches me, now I have to deal with __**her**__ too.'_

'_Talk to her, she wants to be your friend,_' Elektra goaded wrapping her arms around Alana's shoulders. '_But be careful, I think Jamie bear hates her guts._'

The green eyed girl flinched noticeably at the presence of the dominate persona's voice in her head. She gulped feeling a sudden chill roll over her body causing Carlos to look at her worriedly.

"Are you cold Aly?" the pyro questioned with wide brown eyes staring at her attentively moving his chair closer to her.

"Oh, uh, no I'm fine Carlos," she smiled weakly as he took hold of her right hand firmly into his left. "It's nothing."

"You say that a lot," he pouted childishly at her a slight whine in his voice. "Are you sure Aly?"

"Positive, I'm fine," she lied easily to the boy feeling a twang of guilt in her chest while he smiled brightly at her.

'_It hurts to lie to him, because you love him,_' Elektra whispered twirling her fingers through Alana's long hair.

"So Aly, why are you here. If you don't mind me asking that is," Mercedes set down her plastic silverware as the boys at the table looked to the petite girl with great interest.

"My dad brought me here. He'd brought me into the precinct after checking me out of school early and I don't really remember what happened afterwards. I just remember packing my stuff, while my mom told me that my dad was trying to _help_ me," she looked at her plate and moved her hand from Carlos' and clenched them together. "He's a bit late on the _helping_ thing."

The group sat in silence uncertain of what to say to the girl after such a long admission from her. She didn't seem to care about their lack of words, she wanted them to stop talking to her anyway and Alana knew that if she simply told them what she _says_ she remembered, then maybe they would leave her alone. Maybe Logan would stop giving her those suspicious looks with every move she made while they were in the same room that made her skin crawl uncomfortably.

The group resettled when Carlos suddenly chirped about another patient being admitted to the Palm Woods. James and Logan both questioned the pyromaniac about the new girl who he managed to catch a glimpse of on his way to the library.

"She seemed really nice, I didn't ask her name," he shrugged taking a moment to shove another forkful of food into his mouth.

"Why?" James questioned, his eyes perplexed as he looked down to glare at the food on his plate before taking a meticulous bite of food. '_Chew 3 times, 4 times, 5. Okay now swallow. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.'_

"Didn't seem important at the time," the raven haired boy shrugged while giving Alana an affectionate glance making the girl flush slightly.

'_Oh how cute, Carlos doesn't think the new girl is important. He didn't even say if she was pretty or not,' _Chelsee smirked perversely leaning against Alana. '_Looks like you won't have to do anything to keep his attention.'_

'_Would you leave her alone you stupid slut! She doesn't need __**your**__ help,'_ Elektra hissed unexpectedly making Alana twitch inwardly and her head ache.

Putting on a small smile, she masked the pain pulsing behind her eyes; internally she signed at the reappearance of her head aches which seemed to fluctuate in their occurrences. She didn't want anyone else at the table to notice her inner turmoil, although she supposed that they were probably already clued into her mental anguish. After all, they were all mad in some way or another.

"One of the Jennifers fainted in food therapy today," James blurted while shivering at the word food giving his tray a vicious glare before sticking his fork into his small salad.

"Which one was it?" Kendall blinked slowly not particularly caring for the subject matter, but he was glad for something to keep his mind away from the green eyed girl silently eating her apple pie. _'I bet she'd taste like apples.'_

"The blonde one," James replied as noticed Kendall's grip on his fork tightening. "She grabbed onto me, told me that she didn't feel good. Then she just… fell."

"Well, is she okay?" the perpetually morose blond pressed wanting to keep the conversation going. Not that he cared if he was honest with himself.

"I don't know, they got her out of the room the second she hit the ground," he shrugged mostly trying to shake the feeling of her thin clammy hand gripping his arm as her eyes looked at him through a bleary haze. "The other two Jennifers tried to go after her, but the counselors kept them in the room."

'_I bet they didn't like that, those three hate being away from each other,'_ Elektra snickered running her fingers through Alana's hair gently. '_And it looks like someone's a bit more pouty than usual.'_

"So, James…" Alana started feeling everyone's eyes at the table on her as she looked to the hazel eyed boy trying to hold onto the sudden flush of bravery she felt. "Are you going to finish your food?"

The boy's eyes nearly popped out of his head at the question feeling every implication hidden in the seemingly innocent inquiry. Gaining his composure he swallowed the sudden lump in his throat before making a reply.

"Maybe… why do you want to know?" he questioned back shifting in his seat while the other members of the table sat in silence their eyes bouncing between the two like a ball in a pin ball machine.

"Because, I don't want you to get sick," she replied sincerely, her gaze flicking down to her unfinished dessert which she took the moment to take another bite of so she could gather her thoughts as he made his own retort.

"It's not like you care," James said sharply, not intending his words to come out as coarsely as they did.

She flinched, her eyes flashing ice blue before going back to their familiar shade of green before she shrugged calmly. "Well you don't know that, it's not like you asked if I did."

"She's got you there James," Carlos chirped with a slight smirk to cut through the tense atmosphere at the table.

The tall brunette glared in response knowing that the shy girl did in fact have a point, even though he much rather not admit to it.

"I just don't want you to hurt yourself," she said finishing the last of her food and smiled at the boy encouragingly which he returned despite himself.

"I'll be fine," James shrugged trying to shake the unfamiliar warm feeling surging in his gut as he went back to finishing his food. _'When I'm perfect, I'll be more than just fine.'_

Alana frowned slightly as she looked away from the obsessive boy only hoping that he still wasn't spurred to try to continue with his conquest for perfection. A larger part of her knew that the boy would do anything in his power to be perfect; even it meant that he died in the process.

'_I wish I could save him… I wish I could save Carlos too,'_ she thought chewing her lip thoughtfully as dinner ended and they all got up to dispose of their meal trays.

'_How can you try to save them, when you can't even save yourself?'_ Jasmine whispered in a haunting way that nearly made her drop her tray.

The green eyed girl sighed to calm herself as she set the hard plastic tray onto the conveyor belt to be washed. She wanted now more than anything to calm the storm in her head before she could even begin to calm whatever maelstrom that was raging inside the mind of the tall brunette being eyed steadily by the orderlies standing by the trash cans.

'_You can't save yourself. Why bother trying to save anyone else?' _Elektra scoffed crossing her arms over her chest as she quirked a brow at Alana.

"Come on Aly, let's go to the garden, its still light out," Carlos said brightly pulling her out of her murky thoughts. "Wait, do you wanna go with me? You don't have to, if you don't want to that is." He babbled with a bright pink blush staining his tan cheeks.

She giggled at his wide eyed expression feeling her entire body radiate with warmth, "Of course Carlos, I'd love to."

She twisted her fingers with his letting him lead her out the cafeteria, down the hall to the gardens; the both of them unaware of the curious stares they attracted with their bright smiles that contrasted starkly with the usual glum looks on many of the patients residing in the Palm Woods.

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><p><strong>Thanks for reading. Hope you all enjoyed. Please leave a review with your questions, comments, concerns etc... Update for Bucket List is next. xoxo<strong>


	11. Chapter 11

**AN: **_It's taken me too long to update this story and I'm very sorry for that. I haven't been feeling that well mentally or emotionally for a very long time and I'm trying to fight through it and get back to normal. But hopefully I can get back into the groove of things so that I can finish this story, Bucket List and Obsession which will be updated soon. Now this chapter is setting the stage for more things to come between Alana and Logan, Alana and Mercedes, James and Mercedes and so on. __Anyway, hope you all enjoy this chapter._

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><p>Alana sighed softly as she gently rested her head on Carlos' chest, feeling perfectly at ease knowing that for the moment the two of them were alone. She twisted her fingers with his tightly, as the boy she was leaning against gently kissed the top of her head, and then against the nape of her neck causing a tiny shiver to rush down her spine.<p>

"Carlos," she whispered, her eyelids fluttering as his fingers left hers and began to wander down her thighs.

"You're so perfect," he breathed in response, his right hand squeezing her thigh tenderly.

"Carlos…I-I, I'm not ready for that," she almost squeaked, managing to move his hand from the area of her body that quickly began to flush with heat.

He looked at her perplexed at first, but his eyes widened in immediate understanding; his tan cheeks flushed in embarrassment, his hands twisted together, his brown eyes focusing on his lap to avoid eye contact while a thin veil of tension rose between them.

"S-Sorry Aly…" he stuttered biting his as he looked up to her innocently. "I-I didn't mean to scare you or anything."

"It's okay, I just get a little scared when boys try to touch me like that," she explained with a soft smile while taking his hands into her own.

'_Pfft, it's not like you wouldn't have liked it,'_ Chelsea sneered perversely into her ear causing her to flinch inwardly.

"Oh, well we can still cuddle right?" he asked hopefully, his brown eyes looking to her sweetly.

She grinned at him and pulled him in for a kiss. "Of course Carlos," a giggle escaped her mouth as the pyromaniac quickly scooped her into his arms and resettled her into his lap.

"I didn't know we had a game room," Alana said walking hand in hand Carlos who now had a wide eyed expression at her admittance.

"But, it's next to the music room, didn't Kendall show you?" the excitable teen questioned loudly. "Were you never allowed to go before?"

"Well, I was in Isolation for a while, so I wasn't really allowed to go exploring the place by myself," she shrugged moving her eyes to the floor momentarily and squeezed her eyes shut at the sharp pain behind her eyes.

"Really, Logan said that he heard you walking down the hall sometimes after midnight," the raven haired boy said and looked to her innocently. "Are you sure, you've never seen the game room?"

Her eye twitched at the question, while trying to maintain eye contact with the boy still holding her hand. The answer seemed to be on the tip of her tongue, but her head was too clouded for her to focus on anything but the sharp pain that was starting to make it difficult to breathe.

"Aly, Aly are you okay? You don't look so good," he grabbed onto her shoulders startling her from the mental fog that she seemed to be sinking into.

"What?" she replied intelligently while slowly regaining her bearings, her head still murderously aching.

"I think you should go to the infirmary-

"N-No, I'm fine all I need is some water," the words fell from her mouth quickly while doubt etched itself deep onto the features of her normally cheerful boyfriend. "Really Carlos, I'm okay don't worry about me."

"But you-

"No buts, now why don't you show me this game room you're so in love with," she smiled at him, easily causing the corners of the hyper teen's mouth to turn into a broad grin.

"Okay, but only because you said you're okay," he conceded grabbing onto her hand gently. "You'll love the game room, there's all kinds of stuff in it."

'_You know, you really should stop lying to him,'_ Elektra chided suddenly making a shiver roll down Alana's spine inwardly.

"What kind of stuff?" she asked still managing to smile as they both stood outside the aforementioned room.

"Fun stuff Aly Cat," he grinned quickly kissing her cheek before twisting the brass knob to the game room open.

A cacophony of sounds and color assaulted her as she walked into the room which was the size of a standard carpeted gym; looking around the green eyed girl could see a number of other patients sitting on several over stuffed sofas lining the pastel yellow walls. There were all sorts of activities to keep anyone occupied in the room until it was time to move to whatever designated location you were scheduled for.

A large plasma screen TV stood against the farthest wall and on the couch closest to the television sat Kendall, his green eyes not entirely seeing the TV screen; next to the brooding blond was James, his eyes were carefully watching Mercedes, who would smile at him occasionally then avert her vision back to the large screen. And then there was Logan looking ready to collapse from lack of sleep judging by the bags under his eyes, on the farthest end of the couch.

"Cool, huh?" Carlos blurted jerking her attention back to him.

"Yeah, it's really bright in here though," she replied squinting her eyes as her headache worsened.

"Oh, yeah the doctors say that it's supposed to keep up happy. Yellow's a happy color," the Spanish boy shrugged momentarily dropping her hand to touch her cheek.

"Well it makes me want to puke," she exhaled and squeezed her eyes shut, her head beating like a drum.

"Are you okay? Do you need to leave?" he questioned her worriedly stepping closer to her, ready to catch his girlfriend if she were to fall.

"I'll be fine Carlos," she smiled at him slowly and reached for the hand touching her face. "How about we go sit down?"

Wordlessly the pyro pulled her to an oversized bean bag chair next to the sofa that their friends were sitting on and pulled her down with him into his lap; easily Alana settled herself against Carlos' warm chest, the excitable boy pressed a gentle kiss to the skin of her neck making a giggle leave her lips at the sudden contact and heat flush through her quickly.

"Hey, Carlos right?" a sultry girl's voice spoke suddenly in front of them, dispelling the carefree moment the two were having.

"Hi Stephanie," he greeted her easily pretending not to notice the jealous look brewing in the girl's dark eyes. "Have you met Aly?"

"No, I haven't… it's nice to meet you, Aly," Stephanie said tightly, her brown eyes sizing up the girl being held in the Pyromaniac's arms.

'_She's mad you stole little Carlos before she could sink her nasty claws into him,'_ Chelsea smirked just as the slender girl placed her hands to her hips, her glare getting quite obvious.

"So, ugh do you like it here?" Alana awkwardly asked the other girl who was still giving her a hostile look.

"Sure, if you want to call it that," Stephanie replied bluntly while crossing her arms and walked away from the pair.

"Well someone's _obviously_ jealous," Mercedes commented loudly not caring if the new girl heard her or not.

"More like a frigid b-

"You're in my spot Mitchell," a deep baritone male voice growled causing everyone in the rec room to fall into a tense silence.

It was Ozzy, a large black clad teenage boy with dark hair, dark eyes and was currently armed with a menacing scowl; Carlos had told her about the fearsome boy after seeing him lumber into the cafeteria a few days earlier. Now luckily, for the two of them the behemoth of a teen didn't have his sights set on them, but rather their poor defenseless friend Logan, who had been jolted into alertness and was not shaking quite noticeably.

"I wish he wouldn't pick on Logan so much," the pyro whispered into her ear.

"S-Sorry Ozzy, I-I forgot t-that-

The panicking boy's words were cut short by being harshly grabbed by the large male. Ozzy's grip was tight on the smaller boy's upper arms as he lifted him off the couch.

"Ozzy just put him down, he didn't mean to sit in your spot," James interjected trying to quickly pacify the situation.

"Shut up, pretty boy," the taller growled causing both James and Kendall to gulp audibly and back away from him.

Everyone in the room stilled unsure of what to do or if they should risk saving the cowering insomniac from the psychopath currently holding him hostage.

"Put him down you meat head," Alana spoke strongly, her voice easily cutting through the tension in the large room like a knife. She clenched her hands tightly against her sides, her eyes currently a brilliant shade of blue.

Ozzy turned, his dark colored eyes blazing at his new target who dared to challenge him, the grip he had on Logan loosened. A perverse smirk curled to his lips however, when he saw a girl who he could easily crush with little effort standing only a few feet away from him.

"What if I don't wanna?" he challenged tightening his hold back to the fair boy's arms making him his loudly in pain. "Besides what are you gonna do?"

"Heh, that's the same thing someone else said to me," her voice was steady and deadly calm as she moved closer to the angry teen. "Once."

He shivered inwardly as he saw the glare in her ice blue eyes staring into him steadily, but he held his ground despite the sudden fear building in his gut.

"Aly…" Carlos started, but gasped when she turned to him and saw an all too familiar shade of ice blue in her eyes.

She smirked at the Latino sending a small chill rushing down his spine quickly just as she looked back to the bully before her.

"But you know, I'm gonna go easy on you, because it's not your fault that your wiener's just as small as your brain," her smirked widened when Ozzy dripped Logan to the sofa, his attention on her completely.

"He's gonna kill her," Logan muttered mostly to himself as he rubbed his aching arm.

"You stupid little b-

The mountain of a boy didn't have a chance to finish his sentence as the girl rushed forward and kicked his feet out from under him sending him crashing to the floor. He groaned pitifully, the corners of his vision blurring as he felt weight press onto his chest.

"You're lucky I didn't let you finish sentence," Elektra's blue eyes as stepped harshly onto the bully's chest. "I would've had to cut out that tongue of yours."

And before a reply could given, Elektra swiftly kicked him in the face easily breaking his jaw, making a sickening crack echo off the bright yellow walls and sent blood to the floor instantly staining the dark carpet. The other patients gasped horrified and stunned at the spectacle before them, while Elektra simply laughed cruelly at Ozzy's obvious pain.

"Guess you're not so tough now, huh?" she grinned again just as orderlies and security rushed into the room. "Oh, and find a new place to sit."

The bleeding boy didn't respond as he was carted out of the room and unknown to the other tends still in the room a new nightmare began to form itself behind his eyes.

"Why's everyone looking at me? What happened?" Alana asked meekly while rubbing her temples, her headache feeling like a jack hammer to her skull, her knees starting to feel weak.

"Y-You don't remember? Y-You just… Ozzy… and," Mercedes stumbled over her words while stepping from behind James, her fingers still holding onto him tightly.

'_Everyone's just a little… surprised because of the little talk I had with that ogre Ozzy,'_ Elektra slinging her arm over Alana's shoulder.

She gulped softly as she was being led away to isolation for the night; lucky for her it was only her first offence even if she didn't exactly remember it. But as she left the room, she caught Carlos' eye a knot twisted together painfully in her stomach as she looked into his fear ridden brown eyes; for the moment Alana could only hope that the fear in the fire bug's eyes wouldn't be there when she got out of isolation.

"That was scary," Carlos spoke once security finally removed the petite girl from the room. "I never thought…"

"None of us did Carlos," Kendall said putting a comforting arm around the shorter boy's shoulders. "But she helped save Logan's butt, so she can't be as bad as we're thinking."

"Yeah, that's true," the fire obsessed boy sighed thoughtfully and looked at his friend still sitting on the couch quietly rubbing his shoulder. _'I just hope she doesn't get that mad again.'_

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><p><em><strong>I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. Please send your thoughts or anything else in the form of a review. All other stories will be updated soon. This time for real. xoxo<strong>  
><em>


	12. Chapter 12

_**AN:** I'm so sorry I couldn't update any sooner. I just couldn't get to focus on anything lately. But it's finally here. This chapter focuses more on James and his reactions to Alana. I'm also adding in a little bit more about Dr. Collins since she also is an important character to the story. Bucket List is next to be updated to stay tune for that. Enjoy the chapter and leave a review with any thoughts, concerns and questions you may have._

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><p>Alana sat on the small cot in the tiny dark room she'd been placed in for the night, she was still confused about that happened in the game room earlier. She bit her lip while rubbing her temples trying to calm the nerves pinching behind her eyes and piece together the events that happened in the game room that seemed to be shrouded in a heavy fog in her mind.<p>

'_Don't worry about it Aly, your friends don't hate you and your precious Carlos will still love you in the morning,'_ Elektra said reassuringly and smiled at her strangely.

The green eyed girl chewed the inside of her cheek, her eyes looking to the blue eyed entity uncertainly before she exhaled loudly and rested her head against the small pillow. The sleeping pill she'd been given earlier finally kicked in and allowed her to sink into dreamless sleep.

Dr. Collins watched the young girl who flinched erratically shortly after she'd entered her office. She had wanted to talk to Alana about the incident that happened in the facility's game room, but at the moment, it appeared that she wasn't going to be able to get a straight answer.

"So Alana, I wanted to talk to you about what happened yesterday," the older woman said cautiously not entirely knowing which personality would react to the statement. "Can you tell me what happened?"

Her fingers twisted together in her lap as she tried to gather her thoughts together, "Carlos wanted to show me the game room after we'd come back inside from the garden," she started slowly and bit her lip nervously.

"Everything's fine Alana, you're not in trouble, I just want to understand what happened," the older woman said soothingly hoping to quell the nerves the younger was experiencing.

The dark skinned girl settled against the chair she was sitting in for a moment before taking a deep breath and exhaling loudly. She wasn't sure on what happened herself, but she wanted to make it clear that she didn't remember doing anything to the large boy the orderlies hauled out of the rec room yesterday. And she wasn't entirely convinced that any sort of blame for the boy getting hurt wouldn't fall on her.

"After Carlos took me inside, we sat down together on a bean bag and this girl named Stephanie came over to us. She was kind of mean, I don't know why though," she shrugged, her eyes looking at her nails which hadn't been painted since the time she'd been at the Palm Woods.

"Oh, so you've met Stephanie? What happened after that?" the therapist made note of Stephanie's hostile attitude towards Alana no doubt because of the pyromaniac, the teen in front of her was so fond of.

"Well, Ozzy started yelling at Logan for sitting on his spot on the couch. Logan looked really scared just like everyone else in the room was," she moved a strand of hair that had fallen in front of her face from her eyes. "He was holding onto Logan by his arm, and it looked like it hurt."

Once the words left her mouth, she flinched, her whole body tingling while her head ached murderously as she hunched forward, her fingers digging into her scalp. Dr. Collins waited knowing that another personality was due to come out from such an outburst; it was just hard for her to predict which one. When her shoulders finally relaxed, the psychotherapist was greeted with an all too familiar shade of ice blue eyes.

"So Elektra, are you going to finish telling me what happened?" the blonde woman questioned her pen touching paper readily.

"I guess, it's not like she did anything anyway," Elektra started while slouching in the chair, her expression giving away no emotion. "The giant Ozzy needed to be taught a lesson, so I did and now he won't be bothering little Logie-kins anymore."

The smile that curled to her lips made the other female shiver inwardly, if she wasn't trained to recognize this type of disorder she'd assume that Alana herself enjoyed committing the act of violence. But she steadied herself and wrote down what she picked up on, the lust for blood with an odd mixture of possessiveness.

"Why did you do that to Ozzy? He wasn't bothering you or Alana," it seemed odd to her why the girl's alpha personality would protect anyone else beside Alana; it made for an interesting study.

"Because, Logan's a lot like Aly, and people who hurt people like her need to be broken," the cruel smile was gone, easily going back to an unreadable expression. "And he's her friend, if she can't help him then I will."

"Well that's pretty valiant of you," the therapist's pen wrote a few more notes down as the teenage girl shifted back into her quiet nervous self.

"What's valiant of me?" Alana questioned, her brows knitting together in confusion.

"N-nothing, don't worry about it, you can go now," Dr. Collins smiled at her kindly as she closed her pad and clicked her pen again.

"Oh, okay," the younger sighed, rubbing at her temples and made her way out of the room a faint fog hanging over mind. "I wish I could remember these sessions."

Dr. Collins didn't get to respond as the door shut behind the young girl which quickly opened up letting in James Diamond, fresh out of food therapy. The broad shouldered boy sat down in the arm chair across from her heavily, a thoughtful frown holding his face.

"Hello James how was food therapy?" she asked the young man who immediately averted his eyes to the floor and shrugged.

She sighed; it was going to be a long hour.

Alana had nervously sat down at the usual table in the library for study hall, she almost expected everyone to glare at her and tell her that she was no longer welcome to them. But to her surprise, that didn't happen instead Carlos leaned over to her and pressed a gentle kiss to her cheek as the fire bug usually did, the others at the table smiled at her in greeting as if nothing had happened yesterday.

'_And you were worried that your little friends would hate you,'_ Elektra chided and poked her in the left side.

"Hey Alana, um… I just wanted to say thanks, for ugh, yesterday and all," Logan muttered awkwardly, his dark eyes darting from hers to the novel he was reading.

Before she could make the expected confused reply, the green eyes he was looking into bled blue and a slow smirk curled to her full lips. "You're welcome Logie, hope you slept well last night."

"Oh… um, yeah I-I slept fine, t-thanks," he stuttered over his words, not at all expecting the personality shift.

"What?" Alana tilted her head to the side, her eyes fading back into their normal forest green as her countenance contorted into one of confusion.

"N-Never mind," he replied with a shake of his head that made her look at him suspiciously, but she didn't press the issue any further.

Besides, this wasn't the first time where she didn't know why someone was saying 'thank you' to her anyway.

James Diamond was not having a good day, but in all honesty he never really felt as if he was ever having a good anything. Especially on the day that his mother felt it necessary that he should be locked up in this dump (as he so lovingly referred it to).

Recently he had, of course spent much of the night reassuring his hyperactive roommate that his girlfriend wasn't going to kill him if he managed to upset her. Which the taller boy knew seemed impossible and terribly unlikely, even with what looked like a violent personality simmering just beneath that shy and quiet exterior seen by all. It was after the shorter boy had been calmed down and finally settled against the pillows of his bed did James try to fall asleep, knowing very well that the endeavor would be impossible.

But right now as he rubbed the last of the sleep grit from his eyes, he made sure to avoid questions from the nosy woman seated in the large armchair before him. Looking at his cracked fingernails, he did his best to keep his breath even and his secrets behind his teeth. _Much in the same way he'd never put food behind them_.

"James?" Dr. Collins prodded gently; he was one of the more difficult patients who would simply refuse speaking. She was lucky to get five words out of him.

He moved his eyes to her, making sure to construct a blank expression and keep it firmly in place. The brunette didn't want to give away anything to the therapist who kept telling him that he was going to die if he tried to stop eating. _But doesn't everyone die anyway?_ The blonde woman only sighed and wrote something down in her journal then grabbed for her mug of coffee from her desk and took a long sip.

James watched her and calculated the calories she was taking in currently, his eyes now fixed on the crimson colored mug.

_One (8oz.) cup of brewed coffee, 2 calories_

_3 creams, 156 calories _

_4 sugars, 192 calories_

That all added up to 350 calories, that was more than half the amount that James used to allow himself from day to day (500 calories, 550 if Ana said he should take the extra 50 that he didn't (but totally did) want). _He used to be beautiful, he used to be perfect, but now… now he was full of fatfatfat and he hated the woman for it._

"That's 350 calories you're drinking in that cup of yours," he announced quietly almost (_almost) _startling the older woman before she could take another sip.

Coughing softly she set the mug down and lifted her pen. "Oh, do you think that's too much?"

"That's why I told you," he replied shortly turning his head to look somewhere else.

"Hmm, so what did you all talk about in food therapy today?" she pressed, she'd somehow gotten him to start talking, and she wanted him to keep going.

"Nothing, they just tried to shove fat down my throat," he crossed his arms over his chest. _'She doesn't understand. I shouldn't be talking.'_

Dr. Collins wrote down more notes into her journal, making sure to underline what James said about food. He was no doubt exaggerating about being force fed, but to anyone with the deluded vision of perfection, anything could easily be taken out of focus. She looked up hoping to get something else from the boy, but that hope crumpled at the hard eyed stare the brunette was currently giving her.

"That's all for today James, you can go," the therapist said with a loud sigh and closed the leather notebook.

Wordlessly the boy got up, his hand rested to the doorknob heavily as if he was thinking of saying something before he left the room. But not a word came out of his mouth when the door opened and then slammed shut behind him. Putting her leather notebook to the side Dr. Collins rubbed her temples; she couldn't give up on him or any of the patients in the Palm Woods facilities. Whether they accepted it or not, each of them needed her help, even if they didn't want it.

James took his usual seat in group between Logan and Kendall who was sitting next to Alana, her eyes entirely focused on the hyper boy next to her who was excitedly chatting about something as usual. The sandy haired boy could see the desire burning in the blond's jade eyes; shaking his head at the love struck boy he gave Kendall a nudge getting him to put his focus somewhere else.

"What James?" the blond hissed, green eyes darkening slightly at being disturbed from looking at the girl he couldn't have.

"You really need to stop," James replied simply making sure to keep his voice even and calm. _'I don't need him making me look any uglier.'_

In response, the sullen boy huffed and crossed his long arms over his chest, then averted his vision to the carpet and dug the toe of his shoe into a patch in the coarse material. James didn't doubt that Kendall was currently digging his nails into his palms to calm himself. That was something the _both _of them could understand about each other. _Pain is calm, pain is peace. Pain is good._

"Hey Aly, I guess you're going to have a new roommate," Mercedes chirped brightly as she sat down in her usual seat in front of her new rag tag group of friends.

"Oh, I am? Well… wait how do you know?" the other girl quietly spoke looking nervous and ready to panic.

That look on her face made James worry; it made him want to scoop her into his arms and sing to her. But of course, he wouldn't do that not even if Carlos said he could. He looked back to the blond girl who couldn't seem to keep herself still which made the brunette raise a brow.

"I know because, I'm your new roommate," she grinned widely at the girl who only blinked at her slowly all signs of panic draining from her face. "Don't worry, I don't snore."

'_Guess that Collins lady doesn't think you'll hurt Blondie or anyone else, how nice,'_ Elektra smirked crossing her arms as she leaned against the wall next to Carlos.

"Well that's cool, I'm glad I didn't end up getting stuck with Stephanie," the two girls giggled while the boys around them chuckled softly at the remark. "Did they move your stuff in or do you need help?"

"They're moving my stuff for me, but I might need help unpacking," the flaxen haired girl looked to her hopefully. "This is going to be fun."

"Yeah, fun," Alana gave Mercedes a small honest smile as Kelly entered the room to start group.

The way she fidgeted with her hands went unnoticed by everyone in the group, but James. The hazel eyed boy made sure to not be obvious as he watched her have a silent battle with herself. He wanted to reach over and grab her hand when she flinched into Carlos slightly, but he restrained himself just as she went back to her normal still and quiet posture. His eyes then looked to the boy sitting next to him, he caught himself from sighing loudly at the blond currently looking at Alana with a smitten look stamped clearly on his face.

'_He's becoming the definition of desperate,'_ he turned his head to face directly ahead in time to see Mercedes raising her hand to speak.

He felt an unfamiliar surge in his stomach when she mentioned "making friends", but obviously she wasn't talking about him, the two of them were _**not**_ friends. And his cheeks shouldn't have flushed pink when she turned around and winked at him (_he did not have a crush on her_), because she was totally looking and winking at Alana who smiled back at her. He gently slapped his hand to his face and let his palm press against his mouth, uncertain of what he was feeling.

_He did not have a crush on a liar… even if she was pretty._

'_Stupid feelings… stupid Mercedes,'_ he cursed inwardly crossing his arms over his muscular chest and shook out his bangs.

He didn't have time to feel anything for girls like her.

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><p><em><strong>Hopefully the next update will come faster. Please leave a review of your thoughts. Bucket List will be updated as soon as possible (hopefully). It's also that story's last chapter. Until then. xoxo<strong>_


	13. Chapter 13

_AN: I have finally come out of hiding to update this story. I needed some time to really gather up my love for writing again which can be difficult when you have very little support. This update isn't my best seeing as how I am out of practice, but I hope you all enjoy it anyway. The other "chapter" AN I had posted is effectively deleted. I hope I never have to make one of those again, seeing how I hate it when other authors do that. Anyway, here's the chapter that hopefully you'll enjoy!. :)_

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><p>Alana sat on her bed quietly reading the book she'd gotten from the library just before she and her new roommate decided they'd go to their room instead of the game room. Mercedes had insisted that it would be better for her to go tomorrow after dinner, since the both of them would have free time.<p>

'_Aww, your new little friend wants to keep you out of trouble," Elektra sneered while crossing her arms across her chest._

The other girl in the room was writing in a small journal, a concentrated look taking over her delicate features. Biting her lip, the blonde looked at the last sentenced she'd written onto the paper and heaved a loud sigh, she was really hoping that Alana would say something.

_Her father always said she was desperate for attention._

"Something wrong Mercedes?" the quiet girl asked, lifting her eyes from her book to the girl across from her.

"Well, not really, but its…" she trailed off, her words began to tumble over each other in a rush. "It's about James…"

"What about James? Did he say something mean to you?" concern took over the darker girl's features as she set her book down.

"No, no… he didn't say anything mean to me. It's just… it's just that he's…"

"He's what? He stares a lot, if you think that's creepy, at least you don't have Kendall or Dak staring you down all the time," the sullen girl looked down at her hands and twisted her fingers together while the other got silent. "So, what were you saying about James again?"

_Making distractions were starting to become a talent._

"Oh, um… I, ugh… I kind of like him," Mercedes bit her lip as she slowly looked up to her roommate to gauge her expression.

"So? I mean I like him too, he seems pretty nice when he smiles…

'_She doesn't mean it like that Ally, she wants to get in his pants,' _Chelsea chimed in perversely while looking to her sadly. _'Its amazing how __**innocent**__ you still are.'_

"Wait… you mean that you _like_ James, how I like Carlos?" the smaller girl questioned, her bright eyes blinking rapidly, her fingers twisting together again.

"Yeah, but I don't think he likes me," she looked down and twiddled her fingers while Alana simply stared at her, or maybe she was looking past her.

_The quiet girl did that often._

"Aly," Mercedes softly called out to the other moving off her bed slowly, and sat down on the shorter girl's bed. "Are you gonna say something?"

"I was just thinking," she started, her bright eyes darting to the blonde's eyes while twitching noticeably which the other neglected to mention if she noticed the action. "I'm not sure, that I'm the best person to talk about this kind of thing."

"But, you have a boyfriend and I don't." the taller argued back, her voice becoming frantic while her throat tightened. "Just tell me what I should do, please?"

The request was overwhelming, especially to a meek girl like Alana, whose eyes quickly filled with panic and anxiety. She had no idea what she would tell the pretty blonde girl sitting next to her with an expectant and hopeful look on her face.

"I-I don't know what to say, Car-Carlos is the only boy that-" she trailed off, her breath getting caught in her throat, twisting her fingers together she looked back down at her hands feeling awkward and stressed. _'Breathe, just breathe.'_

"Maybe there's something-

"Mercedes, I already told you, I can't help you," Alana sighed in frustration mirroring the expression her roommate now wore. "I don't know, Carlos and I happened, there was no planning to it or anything."

Mercedes stayed quiet watching the other girl twitching in pain again, she saw the color of her eyes shift from their natural green hue to a frosted blue, and then back to green.

"Well, I guess then I should let James and me happen then right?"

"I guess... sorry I couldn't help."

"It's okay, love isn't easy especially if we're in this place," the blonde rolled her eyes in disgust causing the smaller girl next to her to laugh softly.

The compulsive liar smiled at Alana and made her way back to her own bed, a comfortable blanket of quiet settled over the two girls as they both went back to their books, the blonde now reading her own novel.

James sat at his desk, his hazel eyes had been gaining back the shine they'd lost, his cheek bones were less visible much to his displeasure and his once sallow skin was slowly going back to an even olive complexion.

"I can't believe I let them get me so fat," he whined, his voice filled with panic, nervous hands pinching at his face. "I'm practically _obese_."

'_And whose fault is that Jamie,'_ a familiar voice taunted him from the back of his mind.

"Shut up David!" the brunette squeezed his eyes shut feeling overwhelmed by the sudden guilt that attacked him.

'_You're fat and it's your fault,'_ David chanted nearly making the tall boy burst into tears.

"They tricked me," he weakly argued back, his voice cracking while he held his head in his hands. "They made me eat!"

'_You let them poison you Jamie!'_

"Shut up!" he screamed sweeping his arm across the wooden surface knocking everything to the floor. "It's not my fault!"

"It's not my fault!"

James continued with his tirade against '_David' _by sending his fist through the mirror in front of him. Glass cracked around his left hand, large shards crashed to the desk and floor; smaller pieces tore through his skin. A thousand pieces of the mirror lay on the carpet he stood on; blood trickled out of the cuts on his hand and to the floor. It hurt to breathe and he soon realized that he had tears streaming down his flushed cheeks.

'_Weak!'_

Dropping to his knees he wailed, suddenly overwhelmed by his own mind, the food still sitting heavily in his stomach reminding him of the _failure_ he was and _always_ would be.

'_It's your fault.'_

'_Pathetic!'_

Tears kept streaming down his cheeks and dropped onto the blood on the floor and mixed together, his lunges heaved painfully in his chest as his roommate's voice brought him back to reality.

"James… are you okay?" the shorter boy asked nervously, his left hand gripping the door frame tightly. "Should I-I get the nurse?"

The other teenager sniffed harshly before looking at his bleeding hand and then to the mess around him before he made his reply.

"Sure, why not? They'll probably fill me up with drugs, _again_," he sighed raggedly as he slowly stood from the floor, his body feeling drained. "Just, just let me clean this up first."

"No, its okay, I'll clean up the glass… go get your hand looked at," the pyromaniac watched James nervously as he finally made his way out of their room.

He didn't say anything to the brunette when he reached the doorway, throwing his sketchbook to his own bed; he carefully got on his knees making sure to be careful picking up the sharp bits of glass.

"Hey Carlos," the brunette called out, his left hand still dripping blood and he made no effort to stop it with his uninjured hand as the shorter boy looked at him over his shoulder. "Thanks man."

The shorter boy only nodded, going back to cleaning up the broken mirror and throw the shards away into the small trash bin next to the desk and put back the knocked over items that previously been occupying the wooden surface. Carlos didn't understand what had made James break the mirror that he'd loved to stare at so much and hurt himself, he was just thankful that he wasn't in the room to see the act of frustration. But seeing his friend crouched down on the floor, looking utterly destroyed and hopeless made him scared, the most he'd ever seen James look was haunted and angry the same as Kendall.

Only this time the hazel eyed boy looked like he was about to break just like the mirror he'd broken.

"_Kendall! Kendall, save me!" Katie screamed, her cheeks flushed and wet with tears, her voice shrill as she screamed for her older brother._

_Why wasn't he here? Why wasn't he protecting her?_

"_Katie! Katie, I'm coming!" he yelled back desperately racing down the dark corridor that didn't seem to end. "Katie!"_

_He screamed for his sister whose voice seemed quieter each time she spoke his name. When he finally reached her bedroom, his bright green eyes were met with a horrible sight. The preteen was lying on the hard floor, her body looking mangled and useless, her eyes were still open and out of mouth, blood bubbled forth with every word._

"_Ken-Kendall help… I- help me," tears streamed down her bloodied cheeks as he rushed forward trying to figure out where she was bleeding from. "Save me."_

"_Don't worry Katie, I'll save you. I promise," he sputtered tears welling up in his eyes, her breathing slowing down drastically as he gathered her tiny body into his arms. "Stay with me baby sister."_

"_I can't… big brother, I- don't let me die," she sobbed weakly, her small hand digging into the sleeve of his shirt. "Kendall help."_

_Her breathing stopped, her eyes became glassy as she went limp in his arm; the blond boy screamed gathering the small girl into his arms. His sister was dead and he didn't save._

_He failed her and it was all his fault._

Kendall woke with a start, the bloody face of his little sister still fresh behind his eyes as the familiar screams of Logan, alerted him to the other side of the room. The pale boy was thrashing about wildly, as the three large male nurses tried to get the dark haired boy to calm down. For a moment, the blond was impressed that for a boy who looked as if he'd fall to pieces any minute, he was surprisingly strong. But the larger men finally gained the upper hand by injecting him with a sedative that would only temporarily calm him down.

"We'll have to change his meds," one of the nurses said as they began to carry him out of the room.

"Dr. Collins said not to give him any more pills; she doesn't want him to-

"I think the 4 nights of screaming and nearly biting your hand off would strongly disagree with you," the first nurse said cutting off the other. "Let's just get him to the infirmary."

The three men didn't even look his way as they carted his friend out of the room and shut the door behind them. Thankful for the sudden quiet and the absence of his roommate, Kendall reached under his mattress and pulled out the broken knife blade he'd managed to steal from the kitchen. A shiver went down his spine when he thought of what he had to do to get Jett not to rat him out.

"I'm never doing that again," he swallowed dryly, never wanting to be in that position again.

Pushing the thoughts of the sex addict from his mind, he rolled up the sleeve of his night shirt and gently pressed the piece of silver to his already scarred flesh. A soft moan left his lips when pain jumped across his nerves and blood erupted to the surface of his skin, he gasped slightly at the pain as he made another thin line parallel to fresh gleaming cut.

For a moment, he didn't feel like a _failure_.

_Cut_

He didn't _fail_ his sister.

_Cut_

She wasn't dead because of _him_.

_Cut_

It wasn't his _fault_.

_Cut_

He wasn't a _failure_

_Cut_

He panted as his grip on the bloody blade slackened and it fell onto his bed, his eyes stared blankly at the bleeding self-inflicted wounds on his arm. Licking his lips he lifted his arm to his mouth and quietly licked at the red substance on his flesh fully relishing in the iron taste. The blond could barely remember the last time he'd gotten to taste his own blood; he'd been told by the nurses that he shouldn't try to do that.

_But, they didn't understand, they __**never**__ do._

'_They just think I'm crazy,'_ he thought bitterly as he picked up his shiny new friend contemplating whether he'd made more lines to his skin.

A sudden patter of approaching footsteps halted his plans, so instead of making more cuts he quickly stuffed the blade under his mattress and hurriedly pulled down his sleeve before he covered himself with his sheets. Relief wash over him when the footsteps passed his door and continued down the hall, he smiled softly to himself knowing that he'd get to keep the knife blade to himself for another day.

Because those safety pins just weren't doing the job for him anymore.

Alana woke up feeling cold in her bed, looking around she was confused at the sight of another bed in her room. She propped herself onto her elbows and looked to the other occupant of the room; the blonde hair tumbling over the edge of the bed seemed familiar in her sleep driven haze.

'_Don't you remember Ally, your new friend Mercedes is sharing your room with you,'_ Elektra said in a mocking tone, quickly flicking the sleepy girl in the head.

A soft whine left her lips; her head throbbed as she slowly sat up and rubbed the sleep grit from her eyes. The green eyed girl moved her hands to either side of her head and squeezed her eyes tightly. She didn't need this right now.

'_Go away, go away,'_ she chanted in her head softly subconsciously pulling her knees to her chest, today didn't feel like it was going to be a good day. "Go away."

"Ally, are you awake?" the other girl groggily questioned as she stretched under the thin blanket covering her lean body.

"Yeah, we should get dressed, it's almost breakfast I think," Alana replied slowly her hands still pressing to either side of her head.

With a loud sigh she finally moved out of her bed and made her way to the small chest of drawers in the room. The blonde girl got out of bed and began to shuffle around the room as they both gathered their clothing for the day. The shorter girl couldn't shake the feeling rolling at the pit of her stomach that today wasn't going to be much of a good day.

'_Silly Ally, when do you ever have good days,'_ Elektra taunted with a jab between her shoulders.

Today was definitely _not_ going to be a good day.

Mercedes and Alana walked into the library for study hall at the same time, the taller girl had been talking to her new roommate about her father, the wealthy CEO that she desperately wanted to please, but never could.

'_Looks like you're not the only one with daddy issues Ally,'_ Elektra smirked while the two girls took their usual seats near Carlos and Logan who looked particularly exhausted today.

"Hi Ally," Carlos chirped and kissed her cheek quickly pulling her against his side before going back to his usual drawings.

"Hi Carlos," she smiled back, her cheeks flushing with warmth until she felt someone staring her down. "Hey guys."

The heat drained from her face as she tried to keep her smile together, while looking at the other three boys at the table each of them wearing a sullen expression on their faces. Kendall, however simply looked dazed, his green eyes however, looked even more haunted and the sleeves of his shirt were pulled down to his knuckles. He winced in pain as he squeezed his arm there wasn't a doubt in the quiet girl's mind that the blond had found a new sharp object to mar his skin with.

Either way the pain seemed to distract him staring her down the way he _usually _did.

Logan sudden twitch diverted her attention to the dark haired boy who seemed to be battling with himself to stay awake, the bags under his eyes were even darker and his fingers fretfully clung onto the worn novel he always brought with him.

_Oh, if only the demon in his head would leave him alone, especially when he was awake._

The dark haired girl frowned no knowing what she could say, or do to ease the insomniac's troubled mind. She did know what it was like to be haunted by the demons in your mind that just wouldn't you alone. But, she was positive that his nightmares were worse than hers, much worse.

"Hey guys," a familiar deep voice broke Alana from her thoughts, she looked up to see James sit next to Kendall his left hand bandaged a vexed look on his face.

"What happened to your hand?" Mercedes asked, her eyes were full of concern as her bit her lip not entirely sure if she should have spoken to the boy of her yearnings.

"Nothing," the brown haired boy said, quickly looking to the wooden surface of the table, while placing his uninjured hand over his bandaged one. _'Not like you care.'_

And yet, his heart was pounding inside his chest; swallowing thickly he looked to the boy sitting next to him who as he predicted was plainly staring at the dark skinned girl across from them. Rolling his eyes, James nudged Kendall sharply to draw the blond's attention away from the girl obviously trying to ignore the intense gaze of the self-harmer. Kendall turned to the boy next to him immediately irritated at the disruption, but once he saw the judgmental stare looking into the core of his being, he acquiesced and averted his gaze to his sleeve; the fresh cuts throbbed dully under the fabric.

He really wished he could see his blood right now.

_Tasting it would be better._

The cutter bit his lip at the thought, trying not dwell on the sudden rush of blood that went to his lower extremities at the thought of blood smeared over his skin.

_But he has the same blood his sister had… his __**dead **__sister._

_No!_

He exhaled loudly not entirely realizing that he'd been holding his breath, the other teens at the table looked at him briefly before going back to what they'd previously been occupied with. Looking up to the large clock hanging over the doors to the library, Kendall sighed, getting up from his seat he wordlessly let the rest of the tables' occupants know where he was going.

"Have fun with the _doc_," James called after him nearly hissing the last word showing obvious scorn for the woman who held that title.

In response, the slender boy only gave him a long suffering look coupled with an eye roll, before making his way out of the library. He did notice that Alana relaxed minutely at his exit, causing his heart to fall into the pit of his chest. The girl he was in love (_obsessed_) with was glad that _he_ was leaving. She was glad that _he_ wouldn't be around, _he_ made her uncomfortable.

'_Well who could be comfortable with your dead eyes staring them down?' _Katie's voice whispered to him, sending a chill down his spine.

Kendall's hand pushed the library door open slowly as if the wooden object weighed a thousand pounds. He didn't want to make her so uncomfortable that she wanted him gone; he didn't want that at all. What he wanted (_needed_) was for her to want him, for her to be in his arms instead of the hyper pyromaniac. Kendall just wanted her.

Feeling a swell of emotions he couldn't quite name, the blond dug his fingers into the fresh cuts under his sleeve, creating a new wave of pain that instantly eased his anxiety. Letting out a loud sigh, he opened his eyes making sure no one had seen him and quickened his pace; he didn't want to be late for his session and give Dr. Collins anything to bait him with. The woman always seemed to be looking right through him which he hated with all his might.

But, now he had a silver friend hiding snuggly under his mattress to help him cope, at least for a little while.

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><p><em><strong>Please leave a review with your thoughts, concerns, critiques and questions. Until the next update. xoxo<strong>_


	14. Chapter 14

_**AN**: Sorry for the delayed update of this chapter. I've been lazy, and kind of busy. But here it is. After this chapter there will be 2 chapters left of this story. And any other projects after this story may or may not be on hold. Anyway, hope you enjoy this chapter. Hopefully, the next update won't take so long to be posted._

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><p>"Now, if we're going to get her to talk, we have to handle the conversation delicately, wouldn't want to make the situation worse," George Ramazotti said looking to his partner briefly, then back to the building before them.<p>

"I still can't believe little Ally could- surely she couldn't actually have…" the other detective trailed off, his mind not able to comprehend the crimes the young girl was convicted of.

"I know Stabler, but keep in mind that we're dealing with something that we weren't exactly trained for," the older man replied as they walked through the doors of the Palm Woods.

The two newly appointed detectives made their way to the visitor's room with the aid of the portly grounds keeper. They sat themselves down at one of the tables as other patients spoke with respective relatives, most of them ignored the presence of the two men, a couple gave curious glances their way before going back to whatever conversation they were having previously.

Taking a deep breath, George set the manila folders and his notepad on the table not entirely knowing what to expect when his daughter came in the room. Dr. Collins had sent copies of his daughter's files from the facility to the precinct a week earlier, so that they would have a better understanding of her fractured mind, but there was always a risk of the something unexpected happening.

"Hi daddy," Alana softly greeted as she took her seat across from the two officers; she ignored the other male's presence and kept her hands clasped in her lap. "Why are you here? You don't like coming here."

George squared his shoulders as did his partner, taking another breath he shuffled the papers in front of him careful not to let her see the information he had on her and the case they were still working.

"You remember what I told you about Michael?" he paused and allowed a response and continued when she nodded her head. "Well, we've been looking through his journal, there were a lot of entries about you and he mentioned one of his friends-"

"So, what does that have to do with her?" Elektra interrupted her blue eyes now glaring both men down defiantly.

"There was another body found, Jackson Alvarez, he was the friend that Michael mentioned in his journal entries," Marvin said a bit more prepared to see those pale eyes, than the older man next to him. He swallowed when those ice colored eyes locked onto his brown eyes. "Jackson had been missing a little longer than Michael and-

"And you cops in New York think Alana had _something_ to do with that _bastard's _death," Elektra rolled her eyes while crossing her arms, irritation clear on her face. "Those boys had it coming, with what they did to her."

"What did they do to her?" George asked, finally gaining his composure back, he needed to know what happened to his daughter that made her turn into the fractured girl before him. "How bad did they-

"The real question you should be asking, is what _didn't_ they do to her," the girl before him coldly interrupted, her hands gripping the edge of the table. "When she was six, your _brother_ hurt her, but Michael and Jackson, they _broke_ her and _I'm _the only one who can fix her!"

Those frost colored eyes were filled with rage as she quickly rose from the plastic chair she'd been seated in. Clenching her hands into fists she stared down at the two men who looked ready to aim their weapons at her, hands gripped at their gun holsters. A vicious smile took over her face before she sat back down completely ignoring the looks of the patients in the room. She looked at them steadily before speaking once more.

"It figures you're both more worried about saving your own skins, and from what a girl barely past 5 feet, who you think killed 2 perverts, who deserved everything they got," she snorted in contempt at the two men in front of her. "I bet you don't even have a shred of evidence."

"Alana-

"She isn't here right now, _Dad_," Elektra snapped at George Ramazotti who suddenly felt ill, her right hand smacked against the surface of the small table, easily capturing the attention of a few occupants in the room. "And don't come back here if you're only after putting her in jail, while hoping for some kind of confession."

"We're not trying-

"Save it Detective_ Nancy_, you and Detective _Dad_, can go preach your gospel to someone who cares," she snarled getting up from her chair again easily dismissing the two men who stood up as well. "Have a nice flight back."

She exited the room quickly; all the other patients and respective relatives could feel the stifling tension that had settled in the room, the rage that was coming off the petite girl could be felt in waves. The loud slam of the door startled a few, who shrieked in surprise and seconds later had tears streaming down their cheeks and were currently being comforted by their respective relatives. The two detectives sighed in unison as they stood in the middle of the room, the older of the pair felt as if he'd been stabbed in the chest, but he wasn't about to open up about it anytime soon.

"Well, that went better than expected," Marvin said as they made their way to the exit of the facility.

"Really, now what were you expecting Stabler?" George inquired giving his partner a tired look.

"I was expecting her to jump across the table, wild eyes and screaming," Marvin shrugged after giving the grounds keeper a quick farewell as they walked through the double doors. "You know, ready to kill."

The older shook his head and sighed loudly, unlocking the black rental car he looked to the younger man "Believe me when I say this Stabler, no matter what you try to expect, you always end up surprised."

Elektra walked quietly down the hall, throwing glares at anyone who dared to look at her, as she got closer to Mercedes and Alana's shared room, the pressure in her head built, her control was slipping quicker than she wanted.

'_It was fun while it lasted,'_ she thought as the pain behind her eyes became worse.

The pain was enough to bring her to her knees, tears began gathering in the corners of her eyes. She sniffed when the pain finally ebbed away, the bright blue darkening into the familiar dark green color. A ragged breath fell from her lips as she slowly stood from the tiled floor, the fog in her head was starting to clear and Alana wondered why she was in the hallway instead of talking to her father and the other man who had been sitting next to him stiffly.

'_Why am I near my room? I should be in the visitor's room,'_ she thought carefully and bit her lip trying to sift through the thick fog in her mind.

'_She made them leave,'_ Jasmine whispered, startling the girl who was busy looking at her shoes. _'They were making Elektra mad so she told them to leave, but she didn't hurt them.'_

"Good," Alana breathed out quietly to herself and entered her room slightly now at ease.

She was sad that she couldn't remember what had happened in the visitor's room today, but she did hope that she could remember his next visit.

'_If he even comes back,'_ she thought sadly, taking a seat on her bed and picked up her journal. "I didn't even get to say goodbye."

Carlos stared down at his newest drawing in his sketchbook; it was one of the few that weren't on fire. He chewed his lip in contemplation, wondering if he should carry out his plan, while his roommate sat at his desk softly muttering to himself about things that the shorter boys didn't care to know about. Instead, he was more focused on his sketchbook and James bemoaning his lost "perfection" did nothing to aid him with his current dilemma.

"James, could you stop? I'm trying to think," Carlos said softly, giving another glance to the taller boy who finally stopped his obsessive musings.

"Oh, sorry man… ugh, what are you doing?" he asked as he got up from the desk chair and moved across the room. "Do you need help?"

"It's nothing," the Latin boy hastily replied and shut his sketchbook quickly, his fingers gripping onto the object tightly.

"Really, you staring off into space while that book of yours is open is nothing?" the elder of the two prodded carefully knowing that Carlos' childish demeanor could be easily shattered. "You can tell me, you know we're friends."

'_Friends,'_ the pyromaniac thought wistfully, looking back to the drawing pad now clasped tightly to his chest. _'Maybe he could tell me that it's not a bad idea.'_

"Well it's something I drew and I'm not so sure that I should do what I wanted with it in the first place," the raven haired boy chewed on his lip again nervously after he spoke. "I'm not sure if I should give it to her."

"Her, you mean Alana, right?" the confusion in the anorexic's eyes didn't fade as his roommate squirmed on his bed. "If it's another picture of her, she'll like it just like the first one you gave her."

The younger only nodded, his dark eyes fixated on the sketchpad in his hands. If the picture was of his girlfriend, then he wouldn't be so nervous about giving her another portrait. No, this picture had an entirely different purpose and was for the girl who absolutely hated Alana, for what reason he didn't know, nor would the dark haired girl clarify no matter how sweetly he asked.

'_I just hope Ally, doesn't find out,'_ he sighed inwardly and got up from his bed slowly.

"I'll be right back," he said still holding the sketchpad close to his chest as he opened the door and stepped out. "But don't talk to Ally about it… okay?"

"Wait, so that picture isn't… Carlos you're not-

"It's not what you think, she won't leave Ally alone so I-

"So you're going to flirt with the girl-

"No, I already told you it's not like that! This picture has a message in it, and I wasn't sure if I should give it to her, but now I am," the Latino argued back, his knuckles turning white from how tight he clutched his notebook. "Just don't tell Ally, trust me… please?"

James sighed while running his un-bandaged hand through his hair before he looked to his roommate once more. "Fine, just… what's the message?"

Silently Carlos held open the sketchbook that nearly bent from how forcefully he'd been holding it. Quickly, he found the portrait he'd drawn for Stephanie which held a very clear message for her, that instantly made James' stomach lurch momentarily.

"She almost looks the way that- you'd actually do that to her?" James asked his throat had gone dry as the boy still standing in the doorway of their room closed his drawing pad.

"If I have to, then I will," Carlos said resolutely and readied himself to leave the room again. "It worked with Sandy and Sally."

"Yeah, it did," the taller mumbled and watched the shorter boy leave the room, a heavy feeling sinking to the pit of his stomach.

The mismatched group of friends sat at their usual table during dinner, Kendall was at usual broodings as he poked at his food while James did his usual food separation before he would take his first bite, Carlos looked adorningly at Alana who could only blush at the innocent attention as Mercedes seemed to stare blankly at her tray of food, while Logan had just gotten in line to receive his dinner.

"So, did any of your parents visit you guys?" Mercedes questioned politely, her voice contained a dazed tone as if she'd recently (and most likely) been sedated. "My dad came to see me."

'_You remember the screaming you heard when you went to see that nosey little doctor? I bet that was her, must be the reason she's practically on another planet,'_ Elektra snorted at the blonde who did look entirely out of it.

"My dad came to see me too, but I don't remember what we talked about," Alana answered sadly, her fork poking at the lasagna she'd chosen to eat. "I do know that I didn't say goodbye."

"I'm sorry, I didn't say goodbye to my dad either," the heavily medicated girl responded, for an instant she looked as if she'd fall right over.

But before anyone could ask Mercedes the reason for the glassy look in her eyes, a familiar large boy began loudly harassing his favorite target with a larger audience as he tried to corner the boy.

"Just leave me alone Ozzy," Logan squeaked out, as he tried to cower away from the lumbering large boy and not spill the food on his tray.

"Oh come on Mitchell, don't be like that," Ozzy leered down at the smaller boy, a crooked smirk taking over his features, not caring at the orderlies who were quickly surrounding him. "I just wanna _talk_."

"You know _Ozzy_, people might start thinking you've got a thing for Logie here," Elektra smirked easily as she confidently strode over to the bully. "I mean, out of all the boys in this place, you pick only him. Does someone have a crush?"

The large boy's face flushed red at the implication, but fear kept him from acting on the boiling rage filling his gut. Instead he took a step back from the blue eyed girl staring him down, as Logan took the opportunity to escape from the giant teenager's focus as two of the largest orderlies managed to restrain the bully before he could snap out of his fear induced trance.

"What's the matter _fat boy_? Cat got your tongue, or did I just tell everyone your big secret?" she laughed cruelly as Ozzy was removed from the cafeteria no doubt to be put in Isolation for at least an hour.

Without another word, Elektra made her way back to her seat, not in the least bothered by the stares from the other patients. Looking over her shoulder she caught sight of Stephanie who squeaked and turned back to her tray causing a smirk to curl to the blue eyed girl's lips. But just as quickly as it arrived, the formidable ice blue hue darkened into a dark green and the expression went from defiant to timid, Alana was back again.

"Why is everyone looking at me?" she whispered over to Carlos whose own expression was wide eyed and full of surprise. "What did I do?"

"You didn't do anything, don't worry about it Ally," Carlos said after clearing his throat, granted this was far more tame than her first interaction with Ozzy, but it gave him chills nonetheless.

Biting her lip the timid girl looked around the cafeteria and noticed that everyone had finally gotten back to their food and previous conversations as if nothing had happened. Sighing internally, she went back to her own food, hoping that Elektra was done making her appearances for the day.

"Kendall, you couldn't expect to keep this a secret. You could end up killing yourself!" Logan shouted as he tried to reason with the blond who looked ready to snap his neck. "I'm trying to help you."

Gulping, he took a step back not entirely sure if his roommate would stay calm for very long.

"That doesn't make it okay for you to go through my stuff!" the blond snarled, his green eyes dark as his hands clenched into fist by his side, he was furious that the shorter boy had found the blade he'd been hiding and the small mound of pills he'd managed to hide along with the sharp object.

"You know I had to, I didn't want you to get hurt," the dark haired boy said softly, his eyes quickly looking to the open doorway and heaved a sigh of relief at the two orderlies that had entered the room. 'Finally, any second and he would have killed me… or tried to.'

"Hurt, you don't want me to get hurt?" Kendall growled, lunging for the brown haired boy, but was quickly grabbed by one of the large men who had been standing behind him. "I should kill you! You little… get off me!"

He struggled under the tight grip of the orderly, kicking, screaming, scratching and biting at the man while the other tried to inject him with a sedative.

"Let me go!" he screamed, his legs kicking wildly as he thrashed around. "Let me go!"

Wild green eyes locked onto the other male nurse and kicked him in the face roughly, easily breaking his jaw and sent blood spilling from the man's mouth. A delirious laugh left Kendall's mouth at the sight of the red liquid covering the white uniform, his anger at Logan forgotten for a fleeting moment. Finally, the orderly holding onto him got the cackling blond out of the room, the other man still holding onto his bleeding mouth, leaving behind a near hyperventilating Logan and a stunned Mercedes-who'd finally come out of her medicated stupor- and a terrified Alana.

"What do you think they're going to do to him?" Mercedes asked as she gripped onto her roommate's shoulders.

"I don't know, I never knew he could get that mad," Alana bit her lip, a gnawing feeling filling her gut as the door to their room finally closed. "Do you think Logan's okay?"

"Yeah, I think he'll be fine. Kendall might not be though," the blond girl replied quickly going back under the covers of her bed. "Try to get some sleep, okay."

Nodding her head, the shorter girl got back into her own bed, wondering how she would be able to sleep with the howling screams of Kendall filling her head.

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><p><strong>Please leave your comments, concerns etc in the form a review. An update will hopefully come soon. xoxo<strong>


	15. Chapter 15

_**AN**: Sorry once again for the overdue update. I've been lazy and hopefully soon, I'll have a job and will be working. Also going to college (finally) might be happening, but I'll make an update when those things happen. Anyway, this chapter focuses more on some development between Mercedes and Alana's relationship as well as the one James has with his mother. Next chapter will have a bit of a surprise since I was sparked with a new idea. The end might give you a hint on what it might be. But please leave me you thoughts, comments, questions, critiques and concerns in the form of a review and I will try to update the next chapter much faster than I did this one._

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><p>"<em>I'm worried about you sweetheart, the doctor told me that you're not making much progress," Arthur Griffin said with a grim expression as he sat with his daughter.<em>

"_I'm fine dad, I still don't get why you put me in this place," the teenage girl crossed her arms, irritation clear in her voice. _

"_Because Mercedes, you almost stabbed your mother to death," her father sighed heavily as he leaned towards her, his hands clasped together on top the surface of the small table. "And Dr. Collins said-_

"_I don't care what that stupid woman said, she's lying daddy!" Mercedes screamed as she stood up from the table, knocking over her chair in the process. "Why would you believe her? Why would you do this to me?"_

"_Mercedes, calm down sweetheart there's no need to-_

"_Don't tell me what to do! You're the one who put me here!" the young blond continued shrieking as she leapt onto the table and lunged at her father. _

_Her hands gripped tightly onto the fine silk lapels of his dark suit, while her father's complexion paled dramatically as her eyes bore into his. Arthur Griffin remained frozen as his young daughter continued screaming in his face and shaking him, before she was pulled from him and restrained by two orderlies who had rushed over to them. _

"_Let me go! Get off me!" she wailed, her blond her flying about her head as she thrashed under the strong grip of the male nurses above her. "Daddy, tell them to leave me alone."_

_Tears suddenly filled her eyes and trailed down her now flushed cheeks, the orderlies quickly took her out of the visitors' room, not giving Arthur a chance to even say goodbye to his only child. A heavy weight filled his chest as he readjusted his tie and slowly made his way to the exit, wondering if he made a mistake coming to see his daughter who in a blind rage almost killed her own mother and didn't show any remorse for her actions._

'_Maybe there's just no hope for my little girl,' he thought while signing out on the visitor's log and continued walking out of the Palm Woods facility with a heart as heavy as stone._

"So yeah, I talked to my dad yesterday," Mercedes said abruptly as she kept her gaze focused on the ceiling above her.

"Oh, what did you talk about?" Alana asked quietly while refolding her clothes that had been recently washed.

"Nothing much, just about how his businesses are totally awesome and he's making even more money," the blonde replied and rolled her eyes in what would appear to be exasperation.

'_What a little lying-_

"What kind of business does your dad do again?" the other girl questioned, cutting off Elektra who decided to disturb the peace she'd been having all morning.

"All kinds, he makes money pretty much off anything that he can think of while my mother just sits around and spends it," another eye roll from her hazel eyed roommate to indicate her malcontent with her parents.

'_I bet she'd still be spending her daddy's money just like her mommy if she didn't get put in this dump,'_ Elektra said with a snort, while Alana only sniffed and tried not to pay attention to the alter sitting on her bed.

"So, are your parents nice?" she didn't really want to hear the answer or keep talking to the pretty liar across from her. But a distraction from Elektra was usually welcome.

"Nice? That's not even the word I'd use, even if there were a word to describe those two," the young heiress sighed and sat up from her bed and looked directly at her companion. "My mom even thinks I tried to kill her. Can you believe that?"

"No, that's crazy," the smaller girl said moving her eyes back to her clothes still waiting to be put back into the chest of drawers.

"Well, I'm off to therapy; apparently I'm supposed to see that doctor twice a day now," Mercedes said as she got off her bad and made her way for the door. "I'm so ready to leave this place."

Alana made no reply as she set to work on reorganizing her clothing into the drawers of the small piece of furniture, the other girl simply shrugged and gave her roommate a quick hug from behind then, made her exit to go down the hall for her therapy session, a part of her still aching over the thought that her father may never come to visit her again.

"James, you have to eat something; it's only healthy for you to-

"To what, become a fat lard like you want?" he snarled at the counselor who stood in front of him holding up a plate spaghetti and fork. "Get that away from me!"

He made a move to slap the plate to the floor, but the woman before him moved just in time to reset the plate back to the cart that she'd brought into the room. The tall boy was the hardest of the eating disorder patients to persuade, he was stubborn and angry with everyone who tried to get him on a healthy track of eating and maintaining his weight.

James glared at the woman and crossed his arms over his chest, making the muscle tone he'd begun to regain become more pronounced. Meanwhile, he struggled to fight against the sea of nausea that seemed to suddenly appear, from where he couldn't fathom an answer.

With a soft sigh, Gloria looked at the young man before her with pity in her brown eyes, "James, sweet heart don't you want to get better?" she hoped she was asking him the right question.

"Better? I don't need to get better, I was fine before I came to this place!" the hazel eyed boy snarled back at the dark haired woman before him while the Jennifers only looked on, their own little arms interlocked.

The nausea was being persistent, but dissipated for the moment, consumed by the indignation that was now rising into his chest.

"You're not fine James; you're still under weight for someone your height, you need to eat," the last part was uttered in a soft whisper as rage filled the teenager's eyes quickly.

"I don't need to do anything!" he yelled standing up from his chair quickly, easily knocking the plastic object to the floor.

And then the world around him started to spin, his throat was dry and closing in on him, the woman standing in front of him backed away, but then quickly moved forward seeing his dizziness.

"James, are you alright?" Gloria questioned apprehensively, the teenaged boy didn't answer only stumbled backward before gaining his footing once more. "James?"

Everything was moving much slower for the tall brunette, the room continued spinning, his head ached and his chest was getting too tight. He couldn't breathe.

_Something wasn't right._

"I-I'm f-fine," he slurred and managed to focus his now blearing gaze at the counselor. "I-I don't need your help."

_Why was his throat so dry?_

Before the dark eyed counselor could utter another word, James collapsed to the floor like a house of cards.

"Mercedes, do you understand what I'm telling you?" Dr. Collins questioned as she set her pen against her ever present notepad.

"Yeah I get it, you're just like my dad, always telling me what to do," the younger blonde grumbled and crossed her arms over her chest before turning her gaze to the floor.

"You need to control yourself, or you won't have any more visits with your father," the older woman said evenly, her eyes looked intently at her patient. "Your father was quite shaken up after your last visit with him."

The young Griffin snorted in derision, redirecting her line of sight back to the psychotherapist, who continued looking at her expectantly. The hazel eyed girl steeled her gaze as did the woman sitting across from her. Both were waiting for the other to cave, almost as if they were a mother and daughter arguing over curfew that now came to a fierce stalemate.

"I control myself just fine, doctor," Mercedes sneered, the first of the pair to break the tense silence. "I bet my mom put him up to coming here."

Dr. Collins sighed, picked up her pen to jot down a few notes before looking back to the younger blonde. "Mercedes, your mother is still trying to recover from the wounds you inflicted on her."

"I didn't inflict anything on her, she did that herself because, she wants attention. She's desperate for it," the teenager argued back, using the words her father had said to her while averting her eyes to the bookcase behind the therapist. "She's got that disease where you try to make yourself sick and stuff, you know?"

"People with Munchausen don't stab themselves 25 times, your mother almost died Mercedes," the other blonde said severely and folded her hands into her lap.

The psychotherapist could see that being a pathological liar made it nearly impossible for the young girl sitting in her office to admit any sort of fault; she was almost incapable of taking any sort of responsibility for her own actions. She would persistently try to manipulate the situation and put the blame on whoever she chose and currently that was her mother who was still battling for her life.

"I didn't try to kill my mother!" Mercedes suddenly screamed, her bright hazel eyes turning dark with rage, startling Dr. Collins out of her musings.

"Calm down Mercedes," she said evenly, glancing to the clock on the wall that there session was almost over. "Our time is almost up for today."

"Good, I'm getting tired of you accusing me of things I didn't do," the teen snarled as she pressed her back into the leather chair.

The good doctor restrained herself from rolling her eyes and instead forced a tight smile as her patient re-crossed her arms once more.

"James honey, the doctors told me that you're giving them a hard time about eating," Brooke Diamond said to her son in a gentle tone as she took his large hand. "I want you to get better, please."

"But mom, I have to be perfect," the brunette boy said almost desperately to his mother who looked at him with a sad expression on her pretty face. "I'm doing this for you."

"Sweetie, you don't have to be perfect for me or anyone else," she said while using her other hand to move a few strands of his hair from his eyes and caressed his cheek. "I've always loved you just the way you are."

"That's not true, you and everyone else want me to be perfect," he argued, in a more subdued voice than he would with the counselors, he wouldn't dare raise his voice at his mother.

"It is true, and the next time when I come back, I want to hear that you've been doing better and I might even bring you back a special surprise," she told him, hoping that the thought of a reward would motivate himself to becoming healthier.

"I'll try, I still don't like the food here," he pouted and wrinkled his nose at the thought of the cafeteria food, while his mother shook her head at his childish expression.

"Please be good James, I want you to get better," Brooke said as she stood up from the plastic chair in the visitor's room and opened her arms for the tall boy to hug her. "I love you."

"I love you too mom," he replied and squeezed his mother to himself before letting her go and watched her walk out of the large room wishing he could walk away from the Palm Woods with her.

Maybe he could try to get better and eat, hopefully.

"You have a letter," Dr. Collins said at the end of their session, this time she was able to have a more consistent time speaking with Alana than her other personalities. "It's from your father."

"Oh, thank you," Alana responded as she took the parcel from the woman in front of her. "Can I read it in my room?"

"Yes, you may Alana, our session is over so you can go to your room now," the older woman responded with a gentle smile as the timid girl looked at the letter almost blankly.

"Okay," was the simple reply as she got up from the leather chair and made her exit from the small room, her mind becoming more and more curious over the letter in her hands.

Alana sat down on her bed in her shared room alone, thankful that Mercedes was off in anger management therapy, allowing the timid girl to be with the letter postmarked from New York, which felt as if it weighed a thousand pounds. She felt her chest tighten at the thoughts racing in her mind about the possible contents of the letter clutched in her grasp.

Maybe she could have used the bubbly blonde, to help her get the courage to open the envelope.

'_Just open it already, it's not like the thing will explode in your face,'_ Elektra said impatiently while jabbing a finger into the meek girl's shoulder.

"I-I don't know, what if it says that he's never coming to see me again, or that I'm never going home?" the green eyed girl asked and bit her lip, her nerves building the longer she looked at the letter.

'Going home? Honey, that's the last thing that you should be worried about right now, so open that letter and read it already,' the dominant alternate commanded, her bright eyes staring the other down impatiently.

With a heavy sigh Alana opened the envelop to pull the letter out and began to read the neat, looping script that was her father's handwriting.

_Dear Alana, _

_As you already know, this is your father and I'm writing you to tell you that I miss you and that I'm sorry that I couldn't save you and protect you that I was supposed to. You don't know how much it breaks my heart to know that you were in so much pain and I did nothing to help you. I hope that someday you'll find it in your heart to forgive me and your mother who misses you too by the way. I know that it may not seem that way since neither your brother or sister make an effort to call or attempt to visit, but we all miss you and hope that you're finally able to heal. Anyway, I bet you're wondering why I'm writing you instead of sitting across from you in the visitor's room, but your friend Elektra didn't seem too happy with me the last time I was there. The case against you has been officially dropped by reason of mental defect, I know for you that may be hard to believe, but trust me it is for the best. You won't be sent to an asylum for the criminally dangerous or sent to trial and then prison. However, you will be at the Palm Woods until your 30__th__ birthday, or you can make the choice to stay there when that time comes. Hopefully, after this letter I'll try to visit you or call you to see how you're handling this news. Please take care, I love you._

_Your Father,_

_George Ramazotti_

'_Does he actually expect you to believe this crap?'_ Elektra sneered, her hands clenched at her sides as she shook with rage. _'He might as well should have told you that you'd be stuck here for the rest of your life.'_

"But I get to go home, when it's over-

'_Over, it won't ever be over! Everyone thinks you're some kind of freak!'_ the blue eyed persona yelled finally snatching the letter from the other's hands. _'That family of yours doesn't love you anymore, when are you going to take the hint?'_

"My family does love me, they just-

'_Just what, are waiting for the right time to come say hi and show that they care? Don't even bother trying to fool yourself anymore,'_ Elektra folded the letter back and stuffed it into the envelope knowing that Alana would want to keep it. _'Carlos loves you more than they do! Even that little liar Mercedes and they both barely know anything about you.'_

"Mercedes is different and so is Carlos…" she trailed off, her skin warming at the thought of her boyfriend and roommate, who despite confessing to having feelings for James was becoming strangely affectionate towards her.

Before either could continue their conversation further, the loud screech of the fire alarm sounded in the hallway. Quickly opening her door, Alana coughed at the smell of smoke that billowed into her nose and made her eyes water.

Someone was burning the Palm Woods down.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Next update will hopefully come soon, leave me thoughts in a review. Until next time. xoxo<strong>_


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